The Overflow of Kylie's Heart

Daddy

2010-06-30T21:32:00.000-07:00

Psalm 139
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to [b] me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.

19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!

20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?

22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

(OK, mad props to anyone who read all the way through that. If you didn't you will get something out of what I'm gonna say next, but it won't be as effective. I suggest reading that whole psalm.)

Been thinking a lot lately about how God is our FATHER.

You know how dad's are supposed to teach us, support us, spend time with us, love us, show us basically who God is in our lives.

(DID YOU KNOW: Most people's initial view of who God is, is how they view their earthly father?)

If you didn't have a dad who wanted to spend time with you when you were little (or even now), maybe you think God is distant, doesn't have time for you, doesn't care about the things you care about...

If you had a dad who abused you, maybe your view of God is that He's there to punish you for all of your mistakes and that you've got to have everything together, and even then, you still can't do anything right.

If you had a dad who expected you to be perfect, maybe your view of God was that you had to have your act together before you could be saved, or that you couldn't come to God or be used by Him because you weren't perfect yourself.

There are a lot of scenarios, but you get my point.

What I really wanted to point out about the truth in this psalm, is that it pretty much takes away all doubt that God is anything like our earthly fathers. (If you had a great father, AWESOME. This isn't a diss, this is just trying to explain how perfect of a dad, God is.)

Basically, this psalm says: "my child, who I love SO much... you're not lonely, you never have been. other people have been distant, other people have left you, but even before you knew me, I knew you. I'm the one who formed you, my eyes saw yours before you were even a thought. Not only that, but there is no where that you could run to, hide, or fall that I wouldn't be there already. I'm your security. You can lean on me. Your burden isn't too heavy for Me. In fact, I already know about it, so just give it to me. I know your thoughts, your habits, your actions, your words.. all before you even do them. I think about you more than you could even count- you'd fall asleep before you could even begin counting all the wonderful things I think about you."

I want you to know that God isn't some mean guy up in heaven, God isn't some bubble gum machine where you pray and get an answer and walk away, God isn't the word you say before you say a cuss word. GOD is YOUR FATHER.

God is the perfect image of a father. He can restore your heart if you'll let Him.

Be teachable. He's full of grace and mercy. And even more so, LOVE.

He's got your world in the palm of His hand, and He's not about to let go. The season you're in isn't permanent. It's a season. Your Dad wants with all of His heart to help you out, so just learn to put your full trust in Him. REST in Him. And just be still and know that He is God.

Everything you wish your earthly father was to you.. everything you've ever wanted in a dad.. all of your favorite and best qualities you love about your dad... plus more than you could dream of.. That is our God.. and HE IS THAT- FOR YOU.

FOR YOU, SPECIFICALLY.

Receive that. Claim it. It's yours. Take it.

God is love.
Love never fails.
God loves you.
God never fails you.

GOD is your father..
YOU are His child...

Chained to your Past? Move on!

2010-06-12T22:34:00.000-07:00

"But Joseph replied, “Don’t be afraid of me. Am I God, that I can punish you? You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people. No, don’t be afraid. I will continue to take care of you and your children.” So he reassured them by speaking kindly to them." Genesis 50:19-21

This totally convicted me.

After being treated like total crap by his brothers, they apologize and Joseph replies with THAT?!

What people do you need to respond to this like?

What situations are you facing that you know the enemy is planning evil but God is going to work out for your good?

God has the power to turn your depressing day into a beautiful one. Are you allowing Him to do that? Are you living like a victim instead of a victor? Come on!

Getting over your past is the first step into your God-given future.

Where are you on this journey?

Know that you're more than a conqueror, through any situation that you face! God is just WAIIITTTINGGGG for you to understand and live in the freedom of "what the enemy set out for evil, God intended for good..."

I Won't Let Go

2010-05-25T05:17:00.000-07:00

Personally, I believe that every encounter we have with God, no matter where, how long, when, etc... whenever you get into His Word, His presence, whatever.. you can ALWAYS have a breakthrough or revelation moment with Him. You just have to be desperate enough for it.

Are you leaving His presence untouched or not blessed? Why? Are you satisfied with only getting what you 'have' to for the day, or are you seeking out what you know you're so hungry for? What is stopping you from getting everything that God has for you?

Check out this article I found regarding Jacob's wrestle with God until He blesses him, and listen to the song "Don't wanna let you go" by Deitrick Haddon.

ARTICLE:
http://www.citylifechurch.net/Articles/91/City_Life_Church/resources/Messages/Soap_Box/_I_wont_let_go.aspx

SONG:
(lyrics)
http://www.lyricsreg.com/lyrics/deitrick+haddon/Dont+Wanna+Let+You+Go/

(music)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6e7anfPp4S8

The Strokes of My Pen, The Pages of My Journal

2010-05-15T20:12:00.000-07:00

An excerpt from my journal:

May 14, 2010

"... God kept telling me 'I'm not always loud. You don't need to constantly be speaking. Let Me speak to you in the stillness. There is beauty in stillness. Be quiet and let Me speak to you through stillness.' So, I sat there with my hands folded over my chest, breathing, feeling my heart beat against my hands. He said 'I'm closer than your heart beat, I'm more constant than your heart beat, I'm more faithful than your heart beat, I give more life than your heart beat, I last longer than your heart beat...'"

I wonder how many of us really needed to hear that and know that? ... and live like that?

Matthew 8:23-27; Matthew 14:32; Mark 4:35-41; Luke 8:22-25 all tell of Jesus calming the storm.

Do you have a storm in your life that you need "stilled"?

First, understand that God is more reliable, faithful, constant, lasting, and present than your heart beat.

Second, understand that God will still that storm inside of you or around you without you trying to do it on your own (Exodus 14:14)

and Thirdly, you can't do this whole peaceful stillness thing without Him. So don't even try.

Psalm 46:10
"Be still and know that I am God."

2 Corinthians 12:9
"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."

Hmm.. I needed to hear that.

God.. MY god?

2010-05-05T04:49:00.000-07:00

Psalm 86:8-13

8 Among the gods there is none like you, O Lord;
no deeds can compare with yours.

9 All the nations you have made
will come and worship before you, O Lord;
they will bring glory to your name.

10 For you are great and do marvelous deeds;
you alone are God.

11 Teach me your way, O LORD,
and I will walk in your truth;
give me an undivided heart,
that I may fear your name.

12 I will praise you, O Lord my God, with all my heart;
I will glorify your name forever.

13 For great is your love toward me;
you have delivered me from the depths of the grave.

I've been meditating on this passage and I simply can't get over the phrase "Lord my God"

Have you ever had a mindset of thinking or devoting yourself to your relationship with a boyfriend/girlfriend, a friendship, your car, your video games, your job, money, food, success, perfection, music....

Did you know that's an IDOL?

Today when you read the '10 commandments'.. that one seems like one you can check off a list because you think 'oh I don't worship a golden calf or anything like that..' but it's more about what you're actually making your 'god'.. what you're spending your time and energy captivating yourself with.

So when David uses the words "Lord, my GOD"... He's saying "Lord, you're the One I choose to worship first and foremost in my life. You're the One I'm setting all my attention, focus and sole devotion on. You're not only my Lord, You're my God."

Is God your 'God', too?

Great With Kids?

2010-05-03T05:20:00.000-07:00

I've had an incredible desire to use my imagination, lately. I'm not sure if it has anything to do with being a quote "creative" person, but I mean it!

"Playing House" meant that my whole backyard became outer space, a jungle, a mansion, a race track, a farm... and it meant that I was a cowboy, an indian, a thief, a hero, a friend of Tom & Huck or a go-cart champion.. and the hole we dug every day of every summer really did reach China!

Somewhere between then and now, it became odd to play make-believe. The imagination lost it's thrill, or maybe it just wasn't cool anymore. Or was it that I didn't have much time on my hands? What made me think that the whole world of make-believe stopped existing?

What is stopping me from pretending I'm on a secret mission while I'm walking to school? Pretending that the church is a castle? That a bicycle is a motorcycle?

When we realize that we've almost lost the ability to 'get lost' in our imagination, is it too late to go back? What happens between then and now? At what moment did I lose it? Or was it a series of events that took my 'playing pretend' away from my little child heart? Am I too mature now to ever get it back?

I revisited those moments while working with 'Cubby House' at Hillsong Asian Extension Service this past weekend... Everyone said "You're so great with kids!"

Really though, I just wanted to be like them and they didn't see my age. They saw me as a dinosaur, an airplane and a pirate. Their innocence was captivating to me. I wanted it for myself. So I grabbed hold of that moment where I could settle back into my imagination and be "great with kids"...

I love real life, don't get me wrong. But hiding away in the land of my mind is fun, too.

I wanna make a tent of blankets and do my college assessments under it. Maybe that would take the edge off...

Until next time,
Kylie, the Dinosaur-Airplane-Pirate.

xo

Gifts

2010-04-29T17:49:00.000-07:00

If I didn't know what drumsticks were for, what would I use them for instead?

So often, I find that I have the tools God wants me to use in my life, but I just don't know how to use them properly.

Finding a place to use those gifts, when to use them and how to do it are questions that I can't answer for you. I guess what I've come to realize is that you can't limit God when it comes to this stuff.

Nothing is insignificant. Krystle at Asian Extension last week talked about how we each have 'arsenal' weapons that God has given each of us individually to battle with.

We can all identify with that!

Do you love writing cards or notes to people? Do you love drawing? Do you love just sitting and talking with people? Can you tell when your friends are in grumpy moods and you know how to make them feel better? You play music? How about playing sports?

What are the things that you do well, that you know are a gift and that you could totally use as your weapon in this incredible spiritual war?

Sometimes we know our weapons but we don't know how to pull the trigger.
If I didn't know how to write with a pen, my writing skills wouldn't matter.
If I didn't know how to hold a drumstick, it wouldn't matter if I knew any beats, would it?

If I spoke of men and angels and didn't love, it wouldn't matter.

If you don't know how to use what you've been given, sometimes the first thing you need to do is find the purpose.

What is a drumstick for? Am I using it to beat the dust off of rugs or am I using them on a drum kit?

Are you using your gifts for the purposes that you've been given them?

Smooth talker, are you encouraging others or are you gossiping and pulling others down?

Let's get to the root of our gifts, everyone. Find what they are and then attach a purpose greater than yourself to it.

That's what Jesus did.

Speechless

2010-04-29T17:47:00.000-07:00

Hallelujah!

2010-04-27T01:35:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I went on an awesome hike with some incredible friends, here in Australia... The Blue Mountains are amazing.

We got to our destination (an awesome waterfall!) and took a ton of pictures.

As I took it all in, I couldn't help but look out into the valley and just breathe.. and think about how God created everything I was looking at. It was just one of those MOMENTS, you know?

Spontaneously, we counted to 3 and shouted HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!! into the valley from the waterfall.

What else is there to say? "Thank you" almost doesn't seem to be enough..

God's funny bone

2010-04-23T18:30:00.000-07:00

Seriously, I love my relationship with God. It can be so serious and so respectful and then one of us cracks a joke..

Thought this was kinda funny, today.

We were talking and I was saying some stuff and I was just waiting on Him and listening and He starts saying how much He loves me, etc. instead of answering my question or whatever and I started smiling and He was like "Oh My Goodness!"

Which made us laugh because the pun was totally intended. God saying "My goodness" (as in, I'm His.. get it?)

Ok, maybe it was only funny for us.

I love our inside jokes... :)

Run To Me

2010-04-22T02:45:00.000-07:00

If you close your eyes
You'll fall asleep
I won't let you slip
away from Me

Your eyes are weary
Heavy, even
Your heart is burdened
You stare to Heaven

You talk and talk
You cry and scream
You won't be still
to listen to Me

Your attention

Focused in

On things you harbor

Deep within

I am the One

To take your fears

That you’ve carried

For these years

Cry on my shoulder

And receive my love

I’ll descend on you

Like a dove

My peace, you’ll carry

And shine a light

No longer will

You fear the night

Your loneliness

Is gone away

In the power

Of My Son’s Name

Accept it now

It’s a gift of grace

You’re the one

Who sought my face

And when I came

You walked away

But I stay true

Even today

I’ll never leave

I’ll never go

I promise you

I love you, so

Hold to my hand

And follow me

Trust that I

Will never leave

You hunger me

You thirst for more

You ask, you seek

I open doors

Your life awaits

Its in your hands

I give to you

Your promised land

So take and run

Run into Me

I promise you

That you are free

Your fears are gone

I cast them out

No longer do

You live in doubt

So next time

You feel desperately

To cry and fall

Down on your knees

It’s simple

Don’t over complicate

And I’ll always be there…

Never late

not just some fear, all fear

2010-04-22T02:34:00.000-07:00

perfect love casts out all fear.

1 john 4:18

[God Breath] not to be confused with dog breath.

2010-04-22T02:30:00.000-07:00

Look up the scriptures on your own time. That's what I did...
CONVICTION. OUCH. go read your Bible.. and then come back to this blog.

Genesis 1:27, 2:7
breath (Hebrew translation = air in motion; spirit; life)

-man is lifeless dust without the breath of God.

Job 27:3, 32:8, 33:4

breath = life

-the way we have the image of God is because he breathed his life into us.

acts 2:1-4 (holy spirit/Pentecost)
acts 4:23-31 (holy spirit infilling- again)

-you can be filled over and over again
-you can 'breathe in' the presence of God

the breath of God:
1. gives life (abundant, 'Jesus' type life)
2. enables us to act boldly on behalf of God (confidence, authority)

Holy Spirit gives:
1. wisdom, understanding, knowledge, talent, skill, creativity (Exodus 31:3-5)
2. freedom from death and sin (Romans 8:2; Galatians 5:16)
3. power and deep conviction (1 Thessalonians 1:5)
4. unity with God (1 Corinthians 6:18 & Philippians 2:1)

--Jesus & Holy Spirit --> Matthew 3:16

*1 Corinthians 2:4-5

---------------------------------------------

another subject:

Asking and Receiving

Matthew 7:7 (we receive when we ask)
*scripture reference?* "we have not because we ask not"

-sometimes we ask for something (the nations, personal freedom, etc.) and we don't receive it because we don't believe it is already ours!

(if you've asked for the nations.. they already belong to you! receive it!)

perfect example of how I want to live my life:

Acts 4:29-31
Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness. Stretch out your hand to heal and perform miraculous signs and wonders through the name of your holy servant Jesus."
After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly.

-they asked for boldness in speaking the word of God
-they asked it to happen for HIS glory not their own

-immediately after praying, things happened and changed!!

-they were filled with the Holy Spirit
-they spoke the word of God boldly

--because their prayers lined up with Gods will, He not only gave them what they asked for immediately and they received that... He gave them even more (the holy spirit)

*re-read what the Holy Spirit gives us! (power, authority, courage, etc.)...

--the holy spirit ENABLES us to creatively ask and creatively do what the will of God is for our lives.. and helps us go beyond what our natural eyes can see in our circumstances (pray for boldness, receive and accept boldness.. etc.)

I know this was so random and my thoughts were everywhere but I hope you kinda followed it as much as you could and come up with your own personal conclusions on the matter. It was fun to study, so go study it for yourself.

Wasting Time

2010-04-15T19:45:00.000-07:00

I'm at a point in my life where I've recognized that nothing is greater than following Jesus with everything I have and have the revelation that literally nothing else matters. It's a releasing feeling. It's a releasing revelation.

I believe that everyone should eventually come to the point in their own life when they believe this for themselves:

If I'm not doing something for Jesus, increasing His Kingdom, I'm wasting my time.

Apply it personally. Your "something" may be being the best mom that you can be, being friends with that person God really wants you to reach out to, setting the example for your students & co-workers, following that dream that you thought you could never accomplish, pushing through circumstances that are hard to combat right now, staying strong and persevering, serving in your church, witnessing to your neighbors, having your friends over for dinner or coffee, calling that friend that could really use a good conversation, doing your job with joy instead of complaining.. it could be anything for you.. as long as you're doing it for Him.

We've got a set amount of time on this earth. It's about time we start accomplishing what we're meant to do. It's a race, not a Sunday afternoon walk through the park.

This is your invitation to GO. BE. DO.

Go be the light of the world.

Be His hands and feet.

Do what you've been made to do.

THIS IS URGENT. THERE ARE LIVES THAT ARE ENTRUSTED TO YOU TO REACH FOR JESUS. WILL YOU GO? WILL YOU BE? WILL YOU DO?

Psalm 90:12

So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.

Search Bar

2010-04-12T02:17:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you.. but have you ever been in a grocery store looking for an item and you just wish that there was some sort of option to type in what you were looking for and for it to tell you where exactly it is?
Same goes for when something is lost in your room or house.. type in what you're missing, and it tells you where it is.
Yes, I frequently think about this. Now I hope you do, too!

Sitting here.
Thinking.

"God, why can't I just search "MY PURPOSE" "MY CALLING" "HOW I'M GONNA GET THERE" "WHAT TO DO EXACTLY" "WHERE TO GO" etc... type it in somewhere and link after link pops up with all the answers.. ?????

I've heard it said, and was reminded again today in Chapel that if we have all the answers there's no need to trust God for anything.

So, as much as those times in life bug me, I wanna keep the mystery.

Mystery is good. It keeps people searching.

Just wondering if you've ever desired for a search bar to just pop up in your life, too.

Called to be Holy

2010-04-10T22:15:00.001-07:00

I've really wanted to write the past few days but I can't really think of what I want to write.
I guess that's all I really wanted to say.

Here, check out the scripture I've been meditating on lately..

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy."
1 Peter 1:13-16

Still

2010-04-07T05:52:00.000-07:00

Thinking of that word, my fingers are heavy and I don't even feel like I need to type anything.
Though, you wouldn't really understand why I'm writing now, would you?

I'm forced to carry the weight of these fingers slowly typing while my mind ponders the word "STILL"

I'm talking about the "peace, be still" and "be still and know I am God" type of still.

Exodus 14:14 says "The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still."

Psalm 46:10 says "Be still and know that I am God..."

Mark 4:39 says "Peace, be still..."

I'm guilty. I don't want to speak for you, but maybe you're in the same boat.
I say I want to be still before the Lord, yet all I do is talk and talk. Sometimes even my greatest intentions turn into distractions- such as worship music. Yes, it's all great things, but sometimes I really need to just be still.

We live in such a media-fanatic world.. bombarding us with images, music, television, Internet.. we get bored easily. We get bored praying. We get bored singing. We get bored with just about everything.

{imma f-a-n-a-t-i-c/ i rep Christ till i d-i-e... I had to spell that with Lecrae's help, by the way...}

I personally need to get better at just being still, do you?

Still = remaining at rest, free from sound or noise, silent, hushed, calm, freedom from activity, serene (dictionary.com)

If you're not hearing from God, maybe it's time you just sit back and listen. Be still.. and know He is God..

Still by Hillsong

Hide me now
Under Your wings
Cover me
Within Your mighty hand

When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with You above the storm
Father you are King over the flood
I will be still and know You are God

Find rest my soul
In Christ alone
Know His power
In quietness and trust

When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with You above the storm
Father You are king over the flood
I will be still and know You are God

Peace, Be Still by Rush of Fools

Come to Me, you who are weak
Let My strength be yours tonight
Come and rest, let My love be your bed
Let My heart be yours tonight

[Chorus:]
Peace be still, Peace be still
Please be still and know that I am God
and know that I am God

Come empty cup, let Me fill you up
I'll descend on you like a dove tonight
Lift your head, let your eyes fall into Mine
Let your fear subside tonight

There's so much more I want to say.. but I'd rather you figure it out for yourself.
Goodnight.

You don't have to be who you used to be! (Even from 10min ago!)

2010-04-05T06:13:00.000-07:00

I'm Not Who I Was
Brandon Heath

I wish you could see me now
I wish I could show you how
I'm not who I was
I used to be mad at you
A little on the hurt side too
But I'm not who I was

I found my way around
To forgiving you
Some time ago
But I never got to tell you so

I found us in a photograph
I saw me and I had to laugh
You know, I'm not who I was
You were there, you were right above me
And I wonder if you ever loved me
Just for who I was

When the pain came back again
Like a bitter friend
It was all that I could do
To keep myself from blaming you

I reckon it's a funny thing
I figured out I can sing
Now I'm not who I was
I write about love and such
Maybe 'cause I want it so much
I'm not who I was

I was thinking maybe I
I should let you know
I am not the same
But I never did forget your name
Hello

Well the thing I find most amazing
In amazing grace
Is the chance to give it out
Maybe that's what love is all about

I wish you could see me now
I wish I could show you how
I'm not who I was

I've only been here for 3 months. With all the ups and downs, I feel like I've been here for 3 years. I've grown so much in these last few months.. more than I've ever grown in my life- and I'm not exaggerating. It's that phenomenal.

I am in awe of how God can do so much in the blink of an eye. If I already feel like a new person (who I THOUGHT didn't need fixed when I arrived here..) I can't even fathom what else God is gonna do while I'm here.

I miss home, but I'm learning quickly that home isn't really a place. It's really where you put your heart... and I'm finding that my heart is truly with Jesus. As cliche' as it sounds.. I'm going to be "home" ANYWHERE for the rest of my life- if I'm missing my family or not. I'm always going to have God with me. It's so comforting.

To all of you who don't know what's going on in your life and you're looking for something more, or you think you've totally missed out on your opportunity to do something with your life:

It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.
Ephesians 1:11-12 (MSG)

YOU WERE CHOSEN BEFORE YOU EVEN KNEW OF THE SAVIOR OF THE WORLD.
STEP INTO THAT CALLING & BE A PART OF THAT PURPOSE YOU'RE MEANT TO FULFILL!

BE CHANGED, SO YOU CAN HELP JESUS CHANGE OTHERS.

WE'RE ALL ON THIS JOURNEY TOGETHER.

Love,
Kylie

You don't have to be who you used to be... Even from 10 minutes ago.

Our God is: "Holy"

2010-04-01T18:31:00.000-07:00

HOLY.

Psalm 99:9
Exalt the LORD our God
and worship at his holy mountain,
for the LORD our God is holy.

We toss the word around so much, some of us may forget what it really means.

Here's a little reminder from www.merriam-webster.com!

Holy- exalted or worthy of complete devotion as one perfect in goodness and righteousness; divine; sacred;

(The dictionary just used Psalm 99:9 as a reference for the definition of Holy.. how cool is that?)

So let's check out this scripture for a few minutes and dissect these words!

exalt- to raise in rank, power or character; to elevate by praise; to enhance the activity of (intensify); to raise high;
worship- to regard with great or extravagant respect, honor, or devotion;

So that is WHAT we're doing, WHO we are doing it for.. and WHY we are doing it is because:

GOD IS HOLY.

So the dictionary & my own interpretation say this about Psalm 99:9...

We praise and raise high the name of God for His power & character (who He is & what He does), while regarding HIM with extravagant respect, honor and devotion... all because OUR GOD IS WORTHY OF ALL OF IT AND MORE.

Through Jesus, the Messiah!

2010-04-01T04:32:00.000-07:00

Now that we are set right with God by means of this sacrificial death, the consummate blood sacrifice, there is no longer a question of being at odds with God in any way. If, when we were at our worst, we were put on friendly terms with God by the sacrificial death of his Son, now that we're at our best, just think of how our lives will expand and deepen by means of his resurrection life! Now that we have actually received this amazing friendship with God, we are no longer content to simply say it in plodding prose. We sing and shout our praises to God through Jesus, the Messiah!

Romans 5:9-11 (MSG)

Passion for WHAT?

2010-03-31T03:27:00.001-07:00

Something that's been swimming around in my crowded brain for a little while has been the thought:

"Why does everyone seem to be passionate about one thing? There is one thing that drives all of these people I'm with every day. They either love their instrument or their voice. They are carried day by day on their passion for missions or maybe preaching. I'm not quite sure which category I fit in."

Which led me to my next question:

"Why do I never define my passion? Why don't I ever have one thing to talk about constantly, dream about, think about, meditate on, practice, pray about, play with and be obsessed with?"

I feel like there's just too many things that I'm passionate about for me to break it down so easily.
I'm learning that's alright. It's who I am.

I asked God what my ONE passion was.
His answer was "ME."
(as in, Him.)

Which made me think:

"Now THAT is a ONE passion to live for, talk about, be obsessed with, think about and meditate on..."

So, it's alright for me not to be talking about music all the time. That doesn't mean I love it any less. It just shows that I've got a lot of other big things going on that God's working through me.

I've gotta stay diverse in every area of my life- with the one exception of keeping God my number one passion.

Our God is: "a God Who Saves"

2010-03-27T18:27:00.000-07:00

"Our God is a God who saves;
from the Sovereign LORD comes escape from death."
Psalm 68:20

"Hear the joyful sound of our offering
As your saints bow down, as your people sing
We will rise with You, lifted on Your wings
And the world will see that
Our God saves, our God saves
There is hope in Your name"
-"Our God Saves" lyrics by Paul Baloche

Well would you look at that, it seems as if God saving His people from death is surely praise-worthy!!
It's self explanatory what the scripture is saying.. but do we praise God enough for this obvious rescue?

He's our hero.

You're waiting for someone to rescue you from your "death" of a situation? You wish someone would just listen to you? You wish someone would just see you for who you really are so you could stop pretending?

Death used in that scripture is PAST TENSE. That means that what you're saying that is affecting your right now, doesn't have to! He ALREADY defeated it. He ALREADY rescued you from it!

One of my favorite scriptures is in the beginning of Psalm 116 where it says "I love the Lord for He heard my voice. He heard my cry for mercy. Because He turned His ear to me, I will call on Him as long as I live."

That right there talks about God following through with His promises in your 'death' situation, ensuring your heart that 'yes, I can trust Him time and time again to follow through and save me.' Not only that.. He hears you when you call.

Isaiah 59:1 reminds us that God's hand isn't short and His ears aren't heavy.. He reaches out to us and hears us when we call on His name to save us.

Don't forget!

1. God not only hears your voice, he listens to your cry.

2. God not only reaches, He picks you out of those things.

3. God not only has already conquered death, He has already expressed the desire to conquer your situation.

4. God is not only a God who saves, He gives you something to live for once you've been saved.

Philippians 3:7-11
⁷But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. ⁸What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ ⁹and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. ¹⁰I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, ¹¹and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.

Fanning the Flame of Encouragement with the Breath of Life

2010-03-25T02:22:00.000-07:00

FANNING THE FLAME OF ENCOURAGEMENT WITH THE BREATH OF LIFE

You know, I think about the whole James 3 thing about the tongue.. and how it has power to bring life and death.

I'm reminded of the story of this guy who found himself in a refrigerated box car (no clue why, true story.) When he realized he was in the box car, he started freaking out when the door locked behind him. He was stuck. What would happen to him?

He painstakingly etched his last words on the bottom the car, hoping someone would find his last words of love to his family.

In the morning, when the box car was opened, he was dead. Everyone was confused because he had died from what looked like being frozen to death!

The refrigerated box car was broken and was there to be repaired.

The guy stuck in it told himself that he was going to freeze to death. So he did.

I know that's a crazy thing to think but seriously... that's a literal way that we can either choose to speak life or death in our situations and lives.

Anyway- I wanted to talk about the power of speaking life.

Pretty much all of middle school and high school, voices have told me that I'm just not a great friend. In short, I just ended up believing it, and that's partially what I became, because the words being spoken over me by myself and others were negative.
When I was 17 I got back into close contact with a family friend and we started to hang out a lot more and she started being very intentional in her words toward me. She started to speak words of life over me that I didn't believe at all. I wouldn't even accept them at first.
As the year or two progressed, I started to not only believe the the words of encouragement she was telling me, but I started speaking them over myself! In turn, I became those words. I became and believed that I was capable, beautiful, confident, secure, a friend- giving and receiving, etc. It was so powerful!

I'm still on this journey (aren't we all) but isn't it always great to have voices in our lives that speak words of life and encouragement over us?

We're not ever going to 'fully arrive' when we're on this earth, but while we are here, how about we start speaking life over the people in our lives. You can either fan the flame of encouragement, or the flame of discouragement.

Are you willing to be that for someone else? Are you bold enough to walk out of relationships or situations that you realize are just creating death in your life because of the words being spoken? Do you have people in your life that speak words of life over you?

The power that encouragement really has is immeasurable and most of the time, you won't be thanked and you won't see your fruit (the good that it causes in the person's life, basically.)... here on earth.

Don't become weary in doing good, you guys. There are people that you're encouraging right now that you feel like its useless and that they'll never really get it. They may just be a few more words of life away from a break through. Keep the oxygen (THE BREATH OF LIFE) fanning that flame for them!! Be your brother's/sister's keeper!

On the other end, if someone has been so encouraging to you- how about showing some appreciation? Or maybe you have.. but it's time you start believing what they're saying and applying it to your beautiful life!

If you need encouragement and you're not getting it from people, from people you really want it from, or just feeling so down and out- I want you to know that the number one encouragement that has the most power and lasting effect (eternal, actually.) on your life will be:

You reading what God has to say about you. Read the Bible. See what God says, not just other people.
If you wanna hear a voice of encouragement, that's where you need to go.

God's got you in His hand, and He's always speaking those words of life over you. So emulate Him when it comes to others and yourself.

Encouragement goes a longer way than you'll ever believe. If you want to make a difference in someone's life, start by a smile. The most simple form of encouragement. You don't even have to talk to them! haha

:)

Love you guys.

xo Kylie

Our God is: "Near When We Pray"

2010-03-21T23:57:00.000-07:00

Deuteronomy 4:7
"What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way the LORD our God is near us whenever we pray to him?"

This past weekend at Colour Conference (1 & 2) Christine Caine (http://www.thea21campaign.org/) was speaking about a couple Muslim girls who were rescued. Long story short.. they had called out to their gods, etc. with no reply, no answer, no rescue. But, they had heard of Jesus and decided to test it out... they cried out something along the lines of "Jesus, if you're real, save us."

TWO DAYS LATER, the people from A21 rescued them, and as a result, they've both become born-again.

Do you realize the power we have just because of the fact that our God is alive and working every single day?

Our God isn't a statue.

Our God isn't an animal.

Our God isn't the sun, the moon, the stars.

Our God isn't some human who died and made up a religion.

Our God is alive.

Our God MADE the animals, sun, moon, stars, and humans..

Matthew 10 talks about how God even cares for a tiny sparrow- so OF COURSE He cares for you.
Isn't it amazing that even the very hairs on our head are numbered?

Things like that boggle my mind.. and yet, God chooses to love us, care for us, see us succeed... all the way down to OF COURSE He's going to be there when you call on Him in prayer!

Rest easy in knowing that your prayers are not just spilling out of your mouth and hitting the ground. They rise to heaven and catch the attention of your passionate Father!!!

Jeremiah 29:12-14a says
"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD..."

Our God is: "A Consuming Fire"

2010-03-20T21:32:00.000-07:00

Consuming fire sounds scary. It sounds intimidating. It's associated with negative things.

To consume means to :

use something up.
devour it.
purchase something for direct use or ownership.
ABSORB SOMETHING.
to spend something like time, energy or money.

Fire is used to refine, cleanse and purify.

The reality of God being a consuming fire is that it exists to demolish sin.

In Malachi, the people are being warned about how they're not worshiping God how they should be. (Malachi 1:8)

To tie the Old Testament into the New Testament,

Hebrews 12:28-29 says "Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our "God is a consuming fire."

The Message puts it like this:

"Do you see what we've got? An unshakable kingdom! And do you see how thankful we must be? Not only thankful, but brimming with worship, deeply reverent before God. For God is not an indifferent bystander. He's actively cleaning house, torching all that needs to burn, and he won't quit until it's all cleansed. God himself is Fire!"

What about firemen?
How do they shield themselves from the flames?
They wear the right gear.

What gear should we as Christians wear to face the reality of fire?

1. thankfulness
*be aware and appreciative of The Benefit

2. reverence
*outward manifestation of deep respect

3. awe
*overwhelming, extremely powerful admiration
(to be IN awe = to be inspired or influenced)

We said the reality of God being a consuming fire was that it exists to demolish sin.
This is how we can use that fire in our favor to demolish the sin in our lives by purifying and refining our hearts. By putting on thankfulness, reverence and awe when we daily live our lives in worship, we're living out

THE REALITY OF CHRIST DYING ON THE CROSS FOR OUR SINS.

Yes, God is a consuming fire.
Yes, God is just.
Yes, God demolishes the sin in our lives.

BUT

Yes, God gave us His Son to prevent death in the flames.
Yes, God gives us hope.
Yes, God is merciful and graceful.

Fire can be a scary thing when you're not dressed in your fireman's uniform.

Our God is

2010-03-20T21:24:00.001-07:00

OUR GOD IS, is a series I'll hopefully be keeping up with on here. I was recently impressed with a thought "I need to stop worshiping God for what He is doing and has done and will do.. I need to just worship Him for WHO HE IS.
So I wondered.. Who is He?
A simple way of finding out was just looking at a scripture in the Bible that says "our God is.."

Not only will this series explain JUST A FEW things of who He is, but it shows you who He is FOR YOU.

"OUR God is" places ownership on the phrase, in the sense that we belong. We have a place to fit in.

The word "OUR" also brings unity!

This series is going to point out 7 different places in the Bible where it says "Our God is.." and pick apart the scripture for us to better understand who He really is on our behalf!

AWESOME!!!

Vision for the Nations PLEASE READ ALL OF IT!

2010-03-09T22:35:00.001-08:00

Yesterday, God gave me an incredible vision. I told a friend, and she encouraged me 'don't be afraid to share it, because maybe someone really needs to be encouraged with it.' sort of thing.
So... this is me trying to convey into words what was so amazing yesterday and today!

I walk to school. Surprise, I know, if you didn't know already. It takes about a half hour. So, I'm trying to get into the habit of building my prayer life through that time.

Yesterday morning, I was walking up a hill and my legs were burning more than normal. I was sweating like usual! haha! Plus, I was just so tired for no reason. All I could do was focus on how much I didn't want to be walking and how much I wish someone would come pick me up. I was considering faking a fall and/or pitching a tent under a tree for the rest of the day instead of walking. Every time I passed one of those really tiny trees or even a road sign- it's shadow would give me like a half-a-degree cooler temperature.. I pretended like it was helping my suffering... haha!

I thought "you know, if I would just pray right now I bet it would help." So I did!!

As I was nearing a roundabout, I felt the anointing just cover my prayers- cover each word as they came into existence out of my mouth, as God gave each word life and power!
As words just poured from heaven, I got a vision that I really hope inspires and encourages all of you! (I didn't get it till I got home, but that will come later in the blog!)

The whole world was dark, except parts that were illuminated with dots of light. Some masses of light were really powerful, some weak, etc. They were all over the world, but there were still so many places that were blackened. (is blackened a word?)
All of the sudden, the places that were black, that were so unexpected, started to emerge brighter and more attractively lighter and lighter than all the other places! All of the other 'lights' surrounding them all over the world turned their attention to the new lights and wondered 'who could these people be?' 'what's going on over there?!' The curiosity led to more lights! Plus, the lights never faded. They never burnt out. They stayed as vibrant and bright as the day they were lit!!

[This light was representing the unseen, unheard people of untouched nations, cities, towns, tribes, etc. that no one has reached yet, or that God hasn't swept over and made known His enormous presence... places that God needs to do a mighty work in, that we can have a part in helping!]

I believe the nations are going to light up and rise up, becoming a contagious fire!

I came home last night after forgetting what had happened in the morning on the way to school. Remembered it, wrote that down, and thought to myself "I wonder what areas of the world I saw lighting up in my vision?"

So remembering where the lights started to appear, I checked a map of Africa. (because that was the primary focus of the vision) I looked up a political map first, and wrote down each country that was included in the area (KEEP FOLLOWING ME HERE, PEOPLE!)

Wrote down a list of the primary areas, and the countries those areas were made up of:

Countries bordering Namibia:
North- Angola
Northeast- Zambia/Zimbabwe
East- Bostwana
Southeast & South- South Africa

Other countries:

Tanzania
(including parts of: Mozambique, Malawi, Burundi, Rwanda, Uganda, Kenya)

(One of the coolest parts is up next, keep reading!!)

So, I wondered what the ACTUAL world map looked like when it was dark.. with just cities lit up at night.
My conclusion was as follows:

The places I saw lit up, were lit up in my vision, and the places with darkness in my vision, were dark on the map!!

Now, I thought that was incredible, so I went to sleep thinking "wow God that's so cool! Goodnight!!" haha! :)

I woke up this morning, and wanted to pray for the nations so I wanted to see what the Bible said about it. I was going to fish around and try to find my TNIV but my trusty buddy, Amplified was sitting there begging for me so I grabbed it and went downstairs.
Looking in the concordance I checked out the word "nation/s"
When it said to go to Revelation I was like "well, I'll go there first since that's the last place I'd wanna look at." and the next verse said to go to Isaiah.. these are the verses from the Amplified that God totally made me almost cry over. His presence just smashed every part of me this morning while I read this.. thinking "God, I didn't know my vision was so ON with what the Word says!!!" hahaha :)

Check it out:

Revelation 21:23-26

²³And the city has no need of the sun nor of the moon to give light to it, for the splendor and radiance (glory) of God illuminate it, and the Lamb is its lamp. ²⁴The nations shall walk by its light and the rulers and leaders of the earth shall bring into it their glory. ²⁵And its gates shall never be closed by day, and there shall be no night there. ²⁶They shall bring the glory (the splendor and majesty) and the honor of the nations into it.

Isaiah 60:1-5

¹ARISE [from the depression and prostration in which circumstances have kept you--rise to a new life]! Shine (be radiant with the glory of the Lord), for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you! ²For behold, darkness shall cover the earth, and dense darkness [all] peoples, but the Lord shall arise upon you [O Jerusalem], and His glory shall be seen on you. ³And nations shall come to your light, and kings to the brightness of your rising.⁴Lift up your eyes round about you and see! They all gather themselves together, they come to you. Your sons shall come from afar, and your daughters shall be carried and nursed in the arms. ⁵Then you shall see and be radiant, and your heart shall thrill and tremble with joy [at the glorious deliverance] and be enlarged; because the abundant wealth of the [Dead] Sea shall be turned to you, unto you shall the nations come with their treasures.

If you wanna talk about this, I'm so on fire for it.. please message me! So pumped to start praying specifically for these places. SO pumped.

Love you all, praying for you individually. You're not forgotten!

Love,
Kylie

A Good Overwhelming

2010-03-07T02:40:00.000-08:00

Is there ever such thing as not minding the fact that you're overwhelmed? If there is.. I'm feeling it.

Though, I can tell why unbelievers can get frustrated or even suicidal when they're constantly being stretched out of their comfort zones, things aren't going the way they planned, life is pouring out all it can on them..

The difference is that we as believers have HOPE.

Seriously. Think about that.

If we didn't have hope, we would give up. We wouldn't wanna run the race because finishing wouldn't matter.
(wow, brian houston is rubbing off on me, im making up awesome quotes now lol)

Hope shows us that there IS a prize, there IS something to live for, there IS something worth dying for, there IS a God who loves us, there IS a God who has saved us, redeemed us, set us free, broke our chains, there IS HOPE.

Sometimes we forget that and we slow down to the point where we let the enemy take our emotions south.. and we forget that we have that hope inside of us!!

That kinda had nothing and everything to do with what I wanted to say.

It was my introduction, actually. Longer than planned, actually probably longer than the whole rest of the blog.

Anyway, I'm feeling overwhelmed here. It's a good overwhelming though.
If that doesn't make sense its alright.

God is constantly working on my heart and I'm only two months into it. He keeps taking me out of comfort zones and into areas where He knows I need work on my character, strengthening me and making me more of His likeness. I LOVE THAT BECAUSE I HAVE HOPE. (see how it all fits in haha)

So I guess all I really wanted to say was yes, I love it here. yes, God is doing heaps of stuff in my life and I know He will continue to all 3 years.

Honestly, my prayer is that when I return home after even just this year- that everything about me would be so different and so much like Jesus that people are not only incredibly attracted to God through it, but that they won't even recognize it's me- and that I won't even recognize who I used to be.

I'm doing the journey.. and I'm so pumped... :)

Love you all and miss you!!

Pride/Humility

2010-02-18T20:52:00.000-08:00

There is a difference between pride and confidence.
There is a difference between humility and lack of confidence.

Let Him Be Everything

2010-02-18T20:50:00.000-08:00

Wrap yourself up in God so that no one, not even you, can see one bit of your self sticking out. Don't stop at just letting Him complete you. Let Him be everything you are.

My Brain is FRIED

2010-02-10T13:06:00.000-08:00

I'd love just one day to sit and talk to God.
You know what.. maybe I'll do that this Friday.. I need it so bad.
I've been being poured into day after day with hardly any time to process anything. It's overwhelming.. but not a bad overwhelming.. just kinda like "hey, slow down! I wanna take that in!" ;)

I want you all to remember this: It is completely possible to be working and serving for the Lord so much, so often, so hard and such- that you don't have a real relationship with Him.

Completely honest here, The past two weeks I may have received TONS of information and FANTASTIC teaching from some of the greatest christian leaders of our time.. but my quiet time with God has suffered a lot from how "busy" I've been.

So... make sure you have quiet time with God every day. Not only does it make a difference- it's a vital difference.
It's the difference between your brain being fried, or not. The difference between applying the Word and just learning it. The difference between your spiritual life or death.

I don't care where you serve or how much you serve- if you're not making your relationship with God #1... well, don't say I didn't warn ya. ;)

ITS TOTALLY JESUS TIME FOR MEE AHHHHH!!! :)

Daily Appt.

2010-01-24T02:28:00.000-08:00

So, we're all supposed to have this "quiet time with God".. yeah??

I find myself trying so hard to get it.. but not getting it.

I feel like there's something God wants to show me and tell me and I'm getting like sick over it cause I feel like I'm not available or something..

It's not that I'm too busy.. and it's not the people or anything.. I can't really blame anyone or anything for this absence of quiet time, secret place, hiding place..

There's no excuse.. but if I did have an excuse it would be living here with 6 other girls and sharing a room for the first time in my life.

I'm the most independent person and I never realized that till now.. I can't pick up and go without having people follow me, I can't do anything without checking in with at least one person all the time, I can't walk alone, I can't sleep alone, I can't listen to music alone, I can't eat alone, heck I can't even drive here!.....

That would be my excuse if I could have one haha

God, speak to me through the craziness of my life right now.. I'm trying so hard to listen.

Substance

2010-01-21T01:18:00.000-08:00

Ever meet someone who seems like the have it all together.. to come to find that they've got no substance to them? They're a lazy river in the water park of life.. and you thought they were the sickest water slide in the world?

Maybe they're not as bad as the lazy river.. and maybe they do have SOME substance.. but it's just not what you were hoping for or assuming would be there.

Does that have anything to do with the high expectations I place on people?

A friend of mine has recently been catching me in a lot of complaining and wondering. The line I've been hearing is: "Kylie, why do you care so much?!"... and that got me thinking.

Why do I care so much?

Why do I care so much that these people aren't who they apear to be? Do I really desire to help them become who they want to be in life? Am I being selfish?.. and why am I the only one who ever cares about all these things?

Guess it's just one of those things about me that I can't seem to figure out. The majority of me doesn't want to lose that though. I can use that careful heart to really help people become the best person they possibly can become.. I've just gotta channel that all into something positive.

Substance. Character. Integrity. Passion.

I wanna be known for it and leave a legacy of it.

Today is Beautiful

2010-01-20T22:54:00.000-08:00

I woke up singing a line to a song that says "it's not just another day.. day You've made".. it goes on.. but anyway- It's just so exciting to me that God allows us to live one more day just because He delights in us. I love that the sun is shining today because He loves me and wants to see me smile. I love that He gives us friends and housemates that love Him, and inspire me to be closer to Him. I also really love that I'm in Australia rather than PA right now cause of the crazy coldness back there.
I've got fresh perspective here.. I'm not sure if it has anything to do with the hemisphere thing but whatever!! It's working for me! haha

Love you all, enjoy today. It's not just any other day. It's significant and special. It's a gift.

Itching Wounds

2010-01-18T14:20:00.001-08:00

Here's a quick thought for you today. A week or two ago I was thinking about this and finally have time to write.

I remember being told by a nurse that wounds itch while they're healing. Which makes sense. I can't tell you why they itch, but I can make an analogy for you! :)

Think about it:

When you ask God to heal wounds from your past or something- emotional, physical, mental, spiritual.. something that was said to you that hurt you to the core, something that someone did to you, something you've done, unforgiveness, anything!
When you ask Him to heal you.. and as you start to allow Him to do that, the devil tries to get you to pick at it. He wants you to open it up while it's healing so that it doesn't heal properly, if at all. He wants your pain and hurt to get infected so that he can do more damage.
The devil may cause the itching of the wound that is healing, but it's up to you to go pick at it and make things worse. If you let God do His job healing your heart, your everything, you'll find that itching goes away..

It's Not A Dream Anymore

2010-01-11T22:31:00.000-08:00

Things are looking up.

I'm here. I'm in Australia... it's crazy to think I'm here.

I can honestly say I feel like I've waited to fit in here like family all my life... cause I feel at home.. like this part of me is finally not missing anymore. It's incredible.

There's not much to tell other than the flight didn't feel very long because I watched a lot of movies, I slept some, too.

There's so much to tell.. when I have time (key word, when) I'll be able to write in detail.. but for now... I'm here. I am really here.

God is so good.

party in the USA

2010-01-07T16:44:00.001-08:00

I'm for sure gonna sing that at LAX tomorrow morning.. I'm sure that's not an original thought.

Tonight was a lot of fun with my family, but tomorrow morning is gonna be rough.

I've updated my iPod, packed all my clothes and stuff, and I am READY TO GO!!!

...updating this soon, I'm sure... see ya later, USA.

Packing

2010-01-05T21:45:00.000-08:00

Been packing a lot today.. everything fit which is awesome. I'm hoping I can pack a few extra things? We'll see tomorrow morning. I'm gonna double check it all tomorrow.
I've never been proactive in my entire life. It feels good to be getting things done and it's not the night before I leave or anything! :)

In other news.. I had to say goodbye to a lot of people this week. I don't know if I've mentioned that yet but it's been really hard. I feel like I'm out of tears. I really can't cry anymore.

But it's amazing to have friends like Becca, Bri and Lisa who have been encouraging me.. and they're all going through this at the same time with me. So it's nice to know we're all going through ALL of the EMOTIONS!

Through it all remains the constant.. God. "People change and plans get changed and everything changes but You, You always stay the same, stay the same.." -Finish Last by Stellar Kart

Even though it's so sad to say goodbye.. it's not like I'm dying. I'm just moving to Australia for 10 months at a time. No big deal :-P
But it's still SOOOOO EXCITING!

Today I was the most excited because I was packing and it's starting to slowly feel real to me. Not sure when it will hit that "OMG IM GOING TO HILLSONG COLLEGE"... but I'm sure it will eventually.

Until then.. I'm busy getting everything ready and packed..

These are the days.. these are the moments that pass us by..

2010-01-01T16:10:00.001-08:00

I wrote a whole blog and deleted it just now. I figure those thoughts are for me and no one else. But what I can share is this... The songs that used to hold me together like glue.. don't anymore. I don't need them to. Closure is an amazing thing.

Saying Goodbye

2009-12-27T19:00:00.000-08:00

So I've got basically 11 days to go till I leave for Australia...

I've got a lot of big goodbyes to handle this coming week so I'm kinda scared, but at the same time I just wanna get them over with. I love everyone, don't get me wrong. I'm just ready..

I'm sad. I'm happy. I'm excited. I'm nervous. I'm anxious. I'm joyful. I'm.. like everything..

I'm ready to move on, move forward, forget the past, make my self a new name in a place with new faces and new friends.. I'm just so ready.

Tonight is just one of those nights I wish the goodbyes were over with already.. but then I really push myself to remember to live for the moment.

The Importance of a Church Family (forward/preface ha)

2009-12-13T08:36:00.001-08:00

It doesn't get much more obvious than the title.. nothing fancy, I know.

But I'm writing this blog to remind myself to study what the Word of God has to say about this.

The reason? Because today when I woke up, got ready for church, then found out it was canceled it pretty much sucked. It was while I laid in my bed listening to a Hillsong podcast and did my own little praise & worship that I realized "yeah.. maybe it IS important that people gather TOGETHER and go to church..."

More on this subject later.. but seriously.. to those of you who think it's ok to not go to church and do it on your own?..... ok, I don't have anything to say to you... yet.

RELATIONSHIP

2009-12-08T14:09:00.000-08:00

It's cold in here. I'd turn the fireplace on but I'm not too good at that.
I'm chatting on facebook with a future student of Hillsong like my self.. wondering if we'll become friends.
I am also watching "F.R.I.E.N.D.S." on TV right now... but that's almost my point here.

Friends.

Why do we have them? Because life is all about relationships and sharing these experiences with people. Why do you think God made us? Because He wanted to love us and for us to love Him. That does sound almost too easy and simple.

We have love. We have joy. We have peace. We have language. We have hugs and embraces. We have texting. We have facebook.
To share with people.

I guess this Christmas season reminds me that "doing life" with others is so important.. we all long for relationship.. whether that be friendships or love or God. We long for it. We need it.

To satisfy that longing, you gotta get real with God. He knows you inside and out, but because He desires relationship, He desires your communication, too.

Talk to Him... about your frustrations, your desires, your hopes and dreams, your fears... even though He knows them, He still wants you to talk to Him.

When you get your relationship right with God first, everything else lines up perfectly.. but in His timing. Be patient. I promise it's worth the wait... for friends, for love.. for everything you need in your heart.

Prioritize your relationships.. put them in the RIGHT place, and everything will FALL into place.

Receiving Correction from God

2009-12-02T09:00:00.000-08:00

This season in my life, I've been faced with a lot of self examination.
This morning I was reminded that as you grow in your walk with God and become more spiritually mature, God will reveal things to you not for you to judge yourself, but for you to examine your heart. There are things that you will be revealed to you, in His timing, because you're not ready for it yet. For me, this season has been all about pointing out the things in my life that I need to change. Little by little, God's been putting His finger on certain areas of my life, attitudes, etc. that I need to break free from. What I am learning though, is that it is because He loves me that He corrects me. If God did not love me, He would just let me go and have me do whatever was going to please my flesh, but He isn't. He's holding my hand saying "This is what you need to see today. This is what I want to show you because I love you."
Along side that, we all need to realize that it's the Holy Spirit that does that, not us. We can't go around correcting other people because God will correct them in His timing, when they are at the right point in their life to receive that correction and do something about it. When we try to be little "Holy Spirit Juniors" (Thanks, Joyce Meyer!! haha) we're judging ourselves or others.. even if we think we're doing it out of love. It's not our job to judge. It's God's.

I guess what I am trying to say today is to listen to Him when it comes to correcting your own ways instead of always being ready to point the finger at another person. Or maybe even judging yourself.
There's a time for correction and all that stuff, but the point I want to make today is that God brings that.. and brings it out of love.. when you're mature enough to receive it.

So, if you're feeling like God's been pressing His finger on some sore issues lately, good. You're spiritually strong enough to take it and fix it. So do that.. take it and fix it!

I know I am trying to do that.

blahh

2009-11-29T13:58:00.001-08:00

I'm not very sure why I am actually writing this for you people in the cyber space to read..

I guess it's just one of those days that Taylor Swift lyrics can't help you out. Or maybe one of those days that Taylor Swift makes you mad that you're alive. haha Eh, T-Swift, it's not your fault. It's like.. everyone's fault but mine, right? ha!

Sarcastic, no. Well maybe, but not really feelin' that today. Today I'm gonna blame everyone but me and thats ok.. as long as I don't do it all the time.

I think the moment we use other people as our excuse for our own hard hearts is where we go wrong... one day out of 365 is totally fine with me to put the blame on everyone else :)

Today is my day. I will be selfish today. Got a problem? Don't talk to me about it. Today.
"It's too late for you and your white horse.. to catch me now.." (Thank you Taylor Swift!)

:)

Resist = Flee

2009-11-28T16:04:00.001-08:00

James 4:7 tells us that if we resist the devil he will flee from us.

If God is promising us that all we have to do is oppose the enemy, he will run away from us, why does it seem like the devil is still around tormenting us?

Well, take a closer look at your mind and heart! Are you actually resisting him or are you allowing the devil to creep into your thoughts and actions? Don't complain about it if you know you're not actually RESISTING him.. because God says right there in black and white:

the devil MUST and WILL vanish from you IF you resist him!

:)

Hoping for Sun, Receiving a Cloud

2009-11-26T04:32:00.000-08:00

I'm going to try my best to capture this past half hour. I promise you I will fail miserably, but I want you to get a picture of the moment I just spent with the Creator of my whole self and this whole universe.

I stayed up all night to get a glimpse of a beautiful sunrise. My heart jumped inside my chest at the thought of seeing a sunrise here in Pennsylvania for what would most likely be the last time I pursue such an endeavour.
To my disappointment, I peered through a dark window to find rain drops and clouds, hovering over what was supposed to be my perfect morning.
Thoughts raced in my mind such as "Well, time to go to bed, now. No use in staying up even later!"
Still, I grabbed my second cup of coffee and sat quietly, trying to decide if I'd dare still take a walk outside in the wet, cold air. After all, I'd be facing the elements that simply stole my glorious fantasy of an irreplaceable dawn, right? Right.
From what you're concluding because of my introduction, you're assuming correctly that I did go outside.

I purposed in my heart and mind (don't poke fun, I'm telling the honest truth here, even thought it sounds absurdly stupid!) to find contentment, satisfaction and joy in the sunrise even though I could not see it. There were goose bumps racing down my back and arms, but the circumstance did not prevent me from praising God for the beauty and simplicity of a rain cloud. I gave God the glory for each metaphor He laid upon my heart when it came to those rain clouds.
As I rounded the bend of the last leg of my short trip, I glanced at my cell phone to check the time. It was a little past when the sun was scheduled to rise (yes, I checked online!) but instead of going inside the warm house where I could sit and write to you about this wonderful experience, my Father prompted me to stay out just a little bit longer.

Boy, was I in for something incredible!!

I saw a pink lining over the horizon. I figured this was what God wanted to show me- that "yes, amidst the clouds, there will always be that glimmer of hope" but following through with His reputation, He exceeded my expectations once more...

I began to sing. I am not dramatising this in any shape or form, I am utterly truthful as I write to you: When the first note splintered through the silence of the dawn, it was like a light was turned on in the East. My eyes immediately shot over to the skyline where an orange beam of light was rising. Above the tree line was the sun rising, and right above that pink clear air were the gray clouds. In that small section of pure, soft pink sky, the sun was rising as I sang. I continued until the sun disappeared behind the gray clouds above it, where I won't see it for the rest of the day. Tears. Tears. More tears.

This morning, I have learned so many lessons and it was only 7 o'clock when it all happened. Too many to write, too many to explain. Plus, intimate details of each gift like this God gives me, I don't need to share. But something this magnificent should not be easily put on a shelf of memories only to be dusted off occasionally. I wrote this to you that you too may find hope in your morning.

Maybe today you woke up with a hope that seems too rainy to combat. You believe that nothing will make it better, no matter how hard you pray or try to remove it from your life. Like a thorn in your side, it's a sharp, painful burden. I want to remind you today that God does not place these situations you're facing to hurt you in any way. God is love. Love does not do that. But in those circumstances, we are told to give thanks. Not FOR the circumstance, but IN them. Just like He has me wait it out a little bit longer, I was faithful in staying to watch something miraculous. Don't settle for a pink skyline when you could watch the sun actually rise. Do you get that? Don't settle for second best of anything. God has something incredible for you and He is faithful, but you need to be faithful, too. Today, give thanks, not just because it's Thanksgiving, but because you are victorious, and the battle you are facing is already won. Clouds may block your view, but that doesn't mean the sun is not there, and spiritually, it doesn't mean that distractions blocking your view from God, make Him go away. He is always there. He is always with you. Don't believe the lies. He hasn't forgotten about you. Get ready for your special blessing.. Just be patient. Let Him do His work so that you may be complete, not lacking any good thing.

I love you all.. and thank you for sharing this wonderful experience with me. I will never forget it.

Love, Kylie

Dear God, This One is About Music.

2009-11-23T21:38:00.000-08:00

Dear God,

I sit here sometimes and think about all the gifts you've given me. But then my head gets wrapped up in thoughts about all the other gifts that you've given other people I know. I find myself wishing for theirs.. thinking that mine can't even compare to them. I see how other people sing and tear the walls down with their voices. I see those people who can play their instruments upside down and backwards. I think of all the people I know who just seem to do everything 10 steps ahead of me.
I don't know if it's cause I'm just used to being the best and can't stand having someone above me? Or what? I see those people and get so jealous. I start to question why I'm not that good at what I do.
If You've called me for exactly what I know You've called me for.. shouldn't I be good at it? I feel like the harder I try, the harder I fall. I really do. I watch other people sing and play at the drop of a hat. They pick things up easier than riding a bike. What I don't understand is that I'm using my gifts for Your glory and most of the people I'm thinking of right now, aren't. Not only does that make me extremely envious, but it makes me mad. Like, why would You let them succeed and succeed while I sit here and watch myself fail time and time again.
Why do I have to wait for the silver platter when all these other people get it handed to them?
Yet while all these thoughts spin in my mind, I've never actually doubted what You're doing with me. Over and over You've given me favor. I know that most people will crash and burn by doing things their own way.. but when I follow Your will, I know I'll be lifted up in due time.
My mind wants position and popularity, but my heart wants You. I constantly fight war in my head about which side to pick. The grass seems to be greener on the other side, but I know that's just a bunch of lies. I choose to stay on Your path.. even though I may walk alone sometimes, I know You're with me, guiding me and protecting me.
The world may see my progress (little by little, yes) and think it's nothing. They may see my gifts or calling as something small. But every single step of a righteous man (or woman) is ordered of the Lord. No second that I am on this earth isn't placed in front of me to use for my own pleasures, but to please You and bring praise to You.
If I use music for my own gain, what would I really gain as result? But if I use it for You, I will be bearing fruit that will last forever.
I know that nothing could ever change my mind about what You're doing with my heart and my music. Even though it takes a lot of faith to stand firm and not let anything move me in my walk with You, I'm so blessed to say that You've kept me, protected me, and helped me stay the course.. and God, I'm looking forward to this journey with You.
I can't do anything by my own strength.. You don't call the equipped, you equip the called.. I'm blessed to know that You've called me.. and as I walk this road with You for the rest of my life, You'll give me exactly what I need to further the plan You've ordained for me.
I trust You.

Love,
Your daughter, Kylie

"Lord, Lord"

2009-11-16T09:08:00.001-08:00

I can't sit back and watch so many people I know say with their mouths that they love Jesus, but then go about in their lives acting totally opposite! It's making me SICK!
Ready for me to drop a bombshell and make you mad??
Just because you go to church, attend powerful retreats and listen to worship music doesn't make you a Christian!!! You can go through all the motions you want, but if you're not really serving the Lord, IT WILL SHOW.. you may have everyone fooled, but in the end, it's you that will have to suffer the consequences of living a lukewarm life. God will spit you out of His mouth because you never really knew Him...
too many people are only telling you "God is Love".. and as much as that is totally true.. no one is telling you what it reallys means to repent and live all out for Christ...

If you say you're a Christian, follow Christ. If that's too hard for you, too much or too embarressing.. then stop calling yourself a Christian.

Serving Two Masters

2009-11-14T18:24:00.000-08:00

Lately, I've been really meditating on what the bible means by "serving two masters" and how you "hate one and love the other".. and how this pertains to Jesus and the world.. light and darkness.

It's been hitting me so hard that I'm so convicted about it. My heart is so disgusted by Christians who claim to love Jesus with all their heart, then sometimes passing them on the street, you would never even think of them as a follower of Christ.

Yet, I find myself sometimes being the same thing that I hate. As much as you try and want to be 100% serving Jesus, there seems to always be that little part of me (or you?) that just doesn't wanna do it.

Is it rebellion? Is it ignorance? Are we not satisfied enough through Jesus Christ? How hypocritical we are to judge others, when we're just like them.

If we love the world, do you realize that it means we hate God? Read it in the Word. It's true.

What motivates us to be on fire for the Lord? What makes us stay totally on track 24/7 without backsliding the minute we get the chance?

Are we saying that what Jesus did for us wasn't good enough? Surely that's not it. Surely living for Jesus and taking up our crosses isn't just a front that we put up.. a show.. We're definitely not the ones saying "Lord, Lord" and not entering the kingdom.. are we? am I? are you?

Studio Time...

2009-11-06T19:12:00.000-08:00

"When your voice is at it's edge, that's where you get your emotion across" -Phil Herrle (like he said it just now as I'm writing it.. thanks for helping me write my blog Phil haha)

So listen, I'm sitting here in the studio right now and I'm so physically worn out and seriously.. I've never been this emotionally drained from singing for a really long time.

We just got done recording one of my favorite songs I've ever written.. "Vindicated". I mentioned the lyrics in my blog back a few days ago and I really belted it out tonight...

This song is soooo important to me.. I'll write a blog about it but I seriously can't wait for you all to hear it.

There is so much passion in this song, it's unreal.

If you're online between 12am and 5am you'll probably be one of the first to hear the new song up on my myspace.. (myspace.com/kyliedragan)

shameless plug here:

myspace.com/kyliedragan
myspace.com/giveme_nova_caine
facebook.com/kyliedragan
facebook.com/kyliedraganmusic
twitter.com/kyliedragan
youtube.com/user/kyliedragan

Defying Gravity

2009-11-05T14:05:00.000-08:00

I really like the song "Defying Gravity" from Wicked.

We sang it two years ago in high school and it reminds me of those old times but I also like the lyrics haha

So yeah.. I know that's not very inspirational but sometimes you all need to see that I'm human. OK that sounds stupid.. but sometimes people always talk like they're spitting up the Bible.

I don't apologize for ever speaking my heart because with that will come scripture because out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks- so if there is scripture on my heart- I'm gonna write about it.

Butttt... I wanna get into some "fun" stuff, too.

Sooooo go listen to that song cause I like it. haha :)

In The Night (part 2)

2009-10-31T17:40:00.000-07:00

This is probably the first time you've read my "In The Night" blog, so no worries about the "part 2"... the first blog merely mentioned one quote and a scripture reference on June 9th, 2009.

The quote is as follows:

"Only the Lord can give songs in the night - only He can give peace and joy to His children in the midst of their trials and sorrows. It is only through Him that songs can spring up out of troubled hearts - and it is those same songs that truly can touch and minister to the hearts of others."

-Jerry Bouey

On vacation this summer, God showed me a scripture about night. Not only did the scripture mention night, but it talked about songs. I was wondering where else in the bible I could find it, and ended up seeing it a few times.

Thinking about "Songs in the night" confused me because night had to do with sorrow and trouble, but songs had to do with joy and peace and stuff!

(The quote by Jerry Bouey really helps describe the reasoning behind the scriptures)

I'd also like to point out the scripture of Paul and Silas in Acts (Chapter 16:25-26)
It says:

"About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everybody's chains came loose."

There is something POWERFUL about songs at night!

In Job 35, it says God GIVES songs in the night... and Psalm 77 talks about going through a bunch of problems.. then remembering the songs that God has given you in the midst of it to help you through it.

In a natural sense, do you feel more emotional at night? Movies make you cry more, situations in your head seem a lot more real and dramatic? Maybe that's why sometimes my songs are the best at night because I'm either so tired, or on the flip side, so aware. My mind and my heart seem to be in touch a lot more at night than they are at any other time. (Be careful to not let your heart deceive you, by the way! *disclaimer!* haha) But yeah.. I know for me, I'm more emotional at night... hence the phrase "sleep on it!" Things seem to be more logical and orderly in the morning.

Night also represents the spiritual side... the lows of life. When you're in the valley or desert, how are you handling your situations? Are you still praising Him through everything? Because it's in those times that He gives you those songs to hold on to and praise Him with to strengthen you. Then when you come out of it, you look back and sing those songs that your heart birthed and check it out! awesome! right?

Maybe you're not a writer.. a 'song' for you could be anything! What is the gift God has given you? Are you using that gift to glorify Him even in the hard times? That's when it counts.

Just like we read in Acts, miraculous things can happen when we use our gifts for the Lord in the toughest situations we face.

Maybe I'll write more later on this subject but this is all for now. Love you all.. and keep singing.
The Bible says "make a joyful noise".. He never said it had to be pretty when it came out of your mouth! :)

Vindicated

2009-10-29T11:42:00.000-07:00

Just Like That (Vindicated), 2007
by the original members of Project 1614

You try it
You take it
You say you're gonna hate it
instead you get addicted to lies and a way of life that you were never meant for

I've been vindicated
Been set free
I let the Savior take hold of me
and just like that my life 180'd
and just like that my God forgave me

You tried it
You took it
you said you were gonna hate it
but you fall for it again even after you repent then you feel worthless
but you need to know that through the pain God's waiting patiently

Then I hear Him wisper through the lies

(chorus)

Been there
Done that
Who was I to question You?
I know I fall short
But Your grace, it softens the fall

I hear Him wisper through the lies

There is no doubt in my mind that this song was written for such a time as this... To go back and think about when I wrote this, who helped write it and put down the music for it.. it all seems ironic but everything happens for a reason and I'm looking forward to the day this song will be an anthem for my friends who created it with me. I love you guys and I miss you

Dedicated to the original members of Project 1614.. Just like that, my God forgave me..

Hypocrites

2009-10-20T10:57:00.000-07:00

The only scripture I'm gonna use today is Matthew 15:8
"These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me."

I'm sick of all the people who claim to be followers of Jesus Christ who SAY ONE THING AND DO ANOTHER. Why in the world would you ever expect someone to believe you when they see the way that you really are? There are so many people who have been hurt by the "church" that now believe that every single "Christian" is just as shallow and heartless as the next one.

I'm sick of hearing about my friends who fall away from the Lord because of "US CHRISTIANS" who have hurt them, never apologize, never give credit where credit is due, never say thank you, never ask for help, always accusing, never taking the blame..

Maybe a lot of those people don't know what they're doing.. maybe they just grew up in that setting so judging people and taking advantage of people is all they know. But in your defense, it's totally wrong, and you're right for thinking the way you do.

What ever happened to the word LOVE? Who stopped the church from using that word in the right way? Cause somewhere along the line a few of 'us' have started talking the talk and stopped walking the walk... and frankly, I'm so tired of it.

Anyone reading this who has ever been a victim of those kind of people: I AM SO SORRY.
I'm sorry for ever being that "church" that you hate, I'm sorry on behalf of those people who are so blind to what they've done to you, I'm sorry for ever letting you down, I'm sorry for not speaking up for you.
I miss you.
I hope that one day you'll realize that not everyone is like that.. and I hope that one day you'll find what's right for you.. even if it's not right for me.

I love you- and I mean that with all of my heart.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RyavFNpqTyg
(The Rocket Summer- This is Me)

I Will Always (by Martha Munizzi)

2009-10-07T10:18:00.000-07:00

"I will always give You the glory, worship You only.

Lord, I will always love and adore You, there's no one before You.

As long as I have breath, Lord, I promise this that I will always worship You"

Such a simple song, but so powerful. Just thought I'd share that cause it's so true.. make it your cry to your Father... "Lord, no matter what's going on, who is trying to steal my joy, the circumstances that seem too hard for me to handle- I know You are here in the midst of it all, taking care of me and loving me unconditionally- and saving me from things that I may not even know are going on. You're protecting me, You're loving me. This is my offering of thanksgiving because You deserve all my praise.. No one is greater that You."

Quote Series #1: Sensitivity

2009-10-05T14:25:00.000-07:00

Gonna take a few blogs to talk about some random pieces of advice I've been giving people that have made me stop in my tracks and say "wow, that was good Kylie! I'm not quite sure how you even came up with that with how weird you are and your lack of common sense!"
SO.. it may or may not be worth sharing, but I hope you enjoy.

First quote for our quote series:

"Being sensitive is not a weakness. It is a gift."

I'm the type of person who takes things waaaay too personally. I see every sarcastic remark as a personal slam right through my heart. Maybe you're like that too? (And I'm being kinda extreme in some ways.. just being dramatic for writing purposes)

But notice how I didn't give positive light to my personality. Do you find yourself looking at what you don't have rather than what traits God gave you for a reason?

Don't see your sensitivity as a weakness or disability.. but rather- a stepping stone and a gift.

Look at sensitivity this way: Yes, you shouldn't be hurt so easily, but the point of what I'm saying is that sensitivity is viewed in the WORLD as WEAKNESS. But want another word for sensitive? COMPASSION. Not only does a sensitive heart FEEL FOR someone else, themselves, etc. but that kind of feeling can compel someone to have PASSION for a cause.
I'd rather be MOVED WITH COMPASSION like Jesus was, rather than feel nothing at all.

We shouldn't go to extremes with our feelings, but to have sensitivity isn't a bad thing at all.
It's no good to have a hard, cold heart. I'd rather have a heart of flesh- a soft heart that is burdened for the things of God.

So if you've got that sensitive heart, pray that you'll use it and view it in the right way now... look up scriptures about how your heart should be!
If you desire a heart like that, ask for it. God can take your heart of stone and make it one that is filled with everything He is.

I'd go into detail about parts of this, but I just wanted to give you an overview of how to see yourself and your attributes as something GOOD rather than a weakness.

Love you guys!

Kylie

Very Hard Work

2009-10-02T19:12:00.000-07:00

I came to this realization a while back but decided I'd share it with you all today. It seems to fit well with some people who may read this.. SO..

I'm going to assume you all know this already.. maybe you just need reminded.
Honestly, I need reminded a lot. Maybe that's why I'm writing this.

It's very hard work to stay on track with God. It requires effort every single day. Our spirits, when we accept Christ as our Lord and Saviour, is saved and renewed. BUT our minds need continual renewal (Romans 12:1-2) because it's not part of our spirit. Our mind is our emotions- our soul and feelings. So after so much training in the WRONG way of thinking- of course it's going to take a while to train our minds to think the RIGHT way.

Just because we struggle with bad thoughts or habits doesn't mean we're not saved. Don't doubt your salvation just because your mind goes crazy on you sometimes. (maybe even all the time!) But if your mind is really getting to you a lot, you need to figure out what you're feeding it.

Take inventory. Are you entertaining positive or negative thoughts? When you get your head right your heart will follow.. (Thoughts/Renewing your mind is a whole different subject..)

But I'm trying to get you to realize that it's hard work to stay on the right path- but it's always worth it.

I don't remember who said it or what exactly the quote says.. but something goes along the lines of: If it was easy, it wouldn't be worth it.

It's worth the effort you're putting into your perseverance.

New Song

2009-09-12T12:18:00.001-07:00

The second half of my summer was kinda dull spiritually. As much as I was working hard for the Kingdom and doing everything I knew in my heart to do in my relationship with God I still felt somewhat empty and it really discouraged me. I know that it's a season and we go through the ups and downs of life and our walk with God isn't always the mountain top. Yet I was convinced that I was descending faster and faster.
Honestly, it discouraged me from reading my Bible as much or getting into amazing quiet times of worship with God. Maybe there for a few weeks I was just "going through the motions". I knew I needed to get back on the horse and stop this downward spiral from getting out of control.

I wanted to stop the fall before it started!
So I did.

Because of this dry season in my life (by dry I mean musically dry) I wasn't able to write songs. Even if I wanted to, nothing comes out right when my heart isn't completely and totally His for the taking. Part of me didn't even want to write worship songs.
(Now, I'm not saying that just because I FEEL this way.. things ARE this way.. there is a huge difference between FEELINGS and WHAT IS REALLY THERE!).. this "season" was my FEELINGS. (Just clarifying things)

Today I came to a fork in the road. I either pick up my guitar or I don't. (Obviously, I did.)

All I had to do was play one chord and words flew out of my mouth that felt like they had been stored there for months just waiting to break the silence. Each phrase I wrote, the less stress I felt, the more satisfied my heart was, the less burdened I felt, the more at ease I was... etc. I could feel the heaviness lifting from my heart and when I stopped playing and writing down what I had just composed, I smiled. Not just any regular smile- but a smile of accomplishment and a desire fulfilled.

Writing (for me, I have been coming to realize, especially today) is the biggest and best release I have from any pain or frustration I am feeling or going through. It's the one thing that I can truly give God from the depths of my heart. It's my favorite gift that He and I share together. I feel like I'm a co-writer when He gives me songs... His name and my name both go on the title because I help Him and He helps me.

This form of worship is something I can't live without, something I refuse to live without for the rest of my life.

Thank You, Lord. You put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to You...... Psalm 40:3

"I don't want to preach to you. I just care too much to let you walk away from this."

2009-08-23T16:01:00.000-07:00

The title of my blog today is a quote from lyrics to a song by The Wedding (an amazing band my friends helped me discover as a plump 8th grader..)

I've been faced with a lot of broken hearts this past week. Whether they came to me, or I read a blog of theirs, or what. I feel I need to address some things.

First, I don't wanna preach to you. Every single person I've noticed this week has been extremely wounded by people who SAY TOO MUCH. Christians today think that shoving the Word down your throat is gonna make you feel better. The truth is, they don't use wisdom to guide their hearts into which situation their reactions would be tastefully taken or not. Does that make sense?

Secondly, I care too much to let you walk away from this. Not only do I know that each person I've noticed this week with a broken heart has been hurt, but I also see that no one is showing them that YES, SOMEONE DOES CARE and NO, YOU SHOULDN'T BASE YOUR FAITH ON WHAT OTHERS HAVE DONE TO YOU. Just because they're a poor representation of Jesus doesn't mean that following Him with all of your heart would hurt you, too. When really, following Him is the only way you're ever going to feel any better.

Realize that your emotions have nothing to do with your righteousness.
BUT, whatever your relationship with God IS- that's what will be your overflow in your life..
If you're constantly feeding negativity into your life, you're going to reap that also, and vise/versa.

Just because you feel unloved does not mean you aren't.
Just because you feel broken does not mean that there isn't a God who wants to fix you.
Just because you feel unworthy does not mean that Jesus didn't die for you to be saved.

I want to close with something that I totally mean from my heart and don't take anything the wrong way.

My name is Kylie Dragan. I'm a sinner. I screw up. I fall short every single day of my life. BUT I choose to follow Jesus because I want a life of purpose. If that means loving EVERYONE, then I really try to. I can honestly tell you that I care about every one of you reading this. The level of that concern probably has to do with how well I know you. Though, I know that God led you to this blog to read right now because He knows you're hurting. I want you to know I've been there. I've done that. I've felt the way you're feeling right now. Behind the smile I portray is a young woman who really wants the best for you. The only way I'm able to say that honestly is because of the God behind it all. I'm not gonna preach at you if you want to talk. You get enough of that. I just wanna be the shoulder you cry on and the hug that you've been longing for. I wanna be the friend you wish you had. I hope and pray that you believe me.

To check out the song I used lyrics from, check out "Price for Love" by The Wedding

Jesus & The Samaratin Woman

2009-08-10T16:15:00.001-07:00

First, read for yourself John 4:1-26

I believe this is how we as believers should approach and handle any situation whether it be dealing with the Gospel or not.

Remember: Jesus opens the conversation with an invitation and gives her a choice to decide for herself what she wants to do. Jesus didn't force anything on her.

Here are the main points (in order) that I saw while reading this passage:

1. The woman wants what Jesus has and will do what He says to do.

2. Jesus sorts out her problems before giving her what her real desires are.

3. The woman possibly becomes reluctant, but needless to say, is ashamed.

4. Jesus explains and raises the bar for her lifestyle to dramatically change, inviting her to worship the Lord and drink from water that will never cause her to thirst again.

5. The woman attempts one more time to evade the situation/issue because of her spiritual immaturity to understand and believe Jesus, but Jesus quiets her by telling her He is the Messiah.

How can you apply this in your own life?

When we as Christians (and when I say Christians, don't take it lightly! I'm talking about CHRIST-FOLLOWERS) are met with Jesus, we have to make life altering decisions that lead to the uncovering of our sin. When that happens, we may become scared to move on and keep going but Jesus will always lead us through and point us in the right direction!

Don't become discouraged when Jesus points out what you need to change in your life in order to follow Him and receive what He wants to give you. Hand it over to Him who can heal all wounds, disappointments and failures. When you do, you'll be amazed at the ways He has wanted to bless you.. WHEN you choose to be obedient and follow His plan and not your own.

When you find yourself at a well in your life and God asks you for a drink of water, don't ask questions, don't be critical, don't be shy. Be willing and ready for what God has for you- even when it requires sacrifice!

Through His Eyes

2009-07-16T10:17:00.001-07:00

I've been convicted in this area a lot lately. Seeing people the way God sees them..

Instead of looking at people and being full of rage, anger, pain, whatever you're feeling- stop those thoughts right there and think of how God feels about them.

You're no better than the next person, but you're also worth so much in His sight. If you're both equal through the blood of Jesus, look at how He sees those people that you're making fun of, who you're bitter against.. etc.

If you're thinking "Oh my gosh , I can't believe she did this."... think of God look at that person and saying "Please don't do that again, that hurt your friend, but I still love you no matter what."

He's merciful, full of compassion, graceful.. you name it.

So we should be that towards those people as well.

See others as God would see them. They're learning about life just like you are, and we all make mistakes.. whether we own up to them, apologize, forgive others or not.

Be the bigger person.

Camp Expectations 2009

2009-07-13T11:42:00.000-07:00

It's my senior year of church camp.. so my last year. It's always the most amazing week of my year, so we'll see how it goes!

Camp starts July 19th, so, next Sunday I'll get there.

This year I'm expecting to grow in my gifts, grow in humility and love and get a more clear definition of the calling on my life (if He wants to show me) but I'm believing for clarity in some of my questions.
I also expect to be used this year like I've never been used- praying for people, over people, having words for people, etc. more so than in years past. I want to lead by example to all of the people there.
I expect to spend more time in His presence and go deeper than before. It's always a new and better experience in His presence so I pray that this year I'll experience a new level.

If I can think of any other things I'm hoping for I'll write back this week.. but so far that's what I've been thinking of.

Summer Update/ BEFORE CAMP!

2009-07-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

I know things have been happening so fast and a lot of you feel out of the loop when it comes to "news" about all this music stuff.So I decided to inform you all through blog about what's been going on, mostly because I would love for your prayers and also your feedback with ideas and things of that nature.This summer was kicked off by a win of Battle of the Bands at Apex National Youth Retreat in Johnstown, PA over memorial day weekend. It was such a humbling experience to play on the same stage that David DeMarco Band was leading worship for the weekend.On my personal blog on facebook, you can read all about Apex and that experience and how amazing God truly was while we were there. Long story short, that one song that we were able to lead those 700 some people into worship with, was an offering to God through a heart that was surrendering all over again.A few weeks later in June, someone who had been blessed by the music asked for permission to use it on his radio show in Canada. He is part of a mission work there, helping to bring Jesus into the hearts of indigenous island people who don't even know Him. It's a fantastic mission field and the hearts behind it are such willing servants. I'm proud to support their ministry by being played over the radio.At the end of June a week or two ago, I was offered unlimited studio time with the man who makes all of my recordings happen. He is letting me use all of the equipment as much as I want free of charge until I leave for school in January.Things are really coming together, slowly but surely, and I can see God's finger prints everywhere I turn these days. Not to say they've never been there- but they're more visible than ever lately and it's so exciting to watch all of this unfold.I hope you're all just as excited as I am, as my sister McCall is, and as all of the people who make this music happen are. I'm blessed to have a support system backing me up like all of you and I can't wait to get this new music to you. We're working really hard, hoping that you'll really feel God moving through the music every time you listen. We want to build up your spirits and encourage your walks with God. We want this music to put a smile on your face when you feel as if you've lost all hope, and for it to remind you that God's love is limitless and that His mercy endures forever. We hope that it stirs your souls and makes you want to dance, move, shout and sing.Our main goal is to obey the calling on our lives, and if by doing that, we also encourage and inspire you all to worship the Lord, than so be it. We're happy to be a part of your lives.Thank you so much for all of your prayers, support and encouragement. Please continue to pray for our future with our music and for God to keep giving us all of this favor. He never ceases to amaze us in everything we do for Him and His Kingdom.To God be ALL of the glory, forever and ever.Love,Kylie
(that was from my myspace- myspace.com/kyliedragan)

So thats another update for you.. but now comes this wonderful part of "Camp Expectations 2009!"

Jesus Burgers

2009-07-05T11:46:00.001-07:00

I described to one of my good friends from Ohio a few weeks back, that it's important to read your Bible daily. To do so, I related it to an anorexic person eating McDonald's and how even though it was nasty, greasy, fried food- the person was at least eating. In the same way, you don't have to read a whole book of the Bible or dig so deep your eyeballs fall out. You have to START SOMEWHERE, and that can be as big or small as you'd like- just as long as it's SOMETHING. You can't just go starving yourself of the Word.

"When Your words came, I ate them; and they were my joy and my hearts delight, for I bear Your name, O Lord God Almighty." Jeremiah 15:16

Eat yourself a Jesus Burger today.. start off slow if you never read your Bible- God desires us to DIG IN and EAT UP!

Just by getting the Word of God instilled in your spirit and your mind changes things, SLOWLY but SURELY.

Results from working out don't always show up right away, so don't expect a quick fix by reading one verse and thinking all of your problems are going to float away like nothing. It takes action on your part.

I'll keep you posted on the steps to keep going with this "reading the Bible" thing, and hopefully they'll really help you and encourage you to keep reading diligently.

Stay strong and keep your heads up.. Read the Word today! (and every day for that matter!)

Seeds Among Thorns and Good Soil

2009-06-22T12:15:00.000-07:00

The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful. But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown.
Matthew 13:22-23

I can only use analogies that I'm familiar with.. so we're gonna go with music.

I see people struggle with the wealth and the popularity.. the "stardom" way too much. Why can't we all just give our pride to God?

Lately God's been using this SEED He planted in my life to really produce a crop. I'm so humbled and so blessed to be in the midst of this incredible journey that God is taking me on. I can't even explain how thankful I am.

My heart is breaking though, for the people who aren't walking in the perfect will God has placed in front of them. I see people backsliding in their faith because they want to please themselves and become famous, rich, etc.... at the expense of their own hearts and souls. They wind up unhappy and miserable because they're running away from the One who can heal their hearts and mend their broken lives.
I'm not saying that I have it all together.. I'm saying that I've finally got the picture and I've been saved from the death and destruction by grace through this measure of faith that God has placed inside my heart for Him and Him only.

Maybe you don't struggle with the music, maybe your struggle is reading your Bible daily, being slow to anger and quick to listen, loving people who have hurt you, etc.
Regardless, whatever soil your seed is planted on, you have the option of making sure it grows into something fruitful for the Kingdom of God.

Praying for you all.
Love you.

In the Night

2009-06-09T07:24:00.000-07:00

"Only the Lord can give songs in the night - only He can give peace and joy to His children in the midst of their trials and sorrows. It is only through Him that songs can spring up out of troubled hearts - and it is those same songs that truly can touch and minister to the hearts of others."

-Jerry Bouey

based from Psalm 77:6 and others..

On Vacation with God

2009-06-07T16:17:00.000-07:00

"If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast...

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you."

Psalm 139:9-10;17-18

Wow... How amazing are those thoughts? I've ALWAYS thought them to be incredible but not until today on the airplane and on the beach, did I really come to realize the VASTNESS OF THAT THOUGHT.

For it to be a TRUTH, and also THIS AMAZING- I'm in awe.

These few scriptures totally spoke to me today because on the plane we were taking pictures of the clouds and I said to myself "One day You and I will walk on these clouds." They've never been so beautiful to me, and I never completely wrapped my head around how God could care so much for someone so little.. but the honor of knowing and trying to understand that even His thoughts for me outnumber the grains of sand on ALL beaches- let alone the handfull I had today, or the beach I was on!

It's humbling.. but doesn't it also make you feel incredibly loved????

I hope you feel so loved right now!

Graduation

2009-06-05T09:10:00.000-07:00

It's been 12-13 years since I stepped foot on that big yellow school bus and cried my eyes out because I didn't want to leave my mom.
Now it's graduation night and I'm pretty sure I'll be crying over the same thing.

Is it wierd to say that when it hits me, it hits me in "pieces"? Like, I'll start to tear up when I think about it, but when I stop thinking about it I'm OK- and then it doesn't bother me? I guess when I dwell on the thoughts of leaving for Australia is when I get worked up. I haven't officially broken down yet. I've got a while for that to kick in.

Graduation was always an "ending" to me. Throughout high school, every time I thought of "Commencement" I thought basically... LIFE ENDING.
Until recently have I realized that it's truly a beginning. It was when that clicked in my heart that I started looking forward to it without crying or being upset about graduating.

I know I have so many things in my future to look forward to that God is really beginning to bring forth and open doors... (such as college)

Yes, it's bittersweet but I think being able to let go and move on but still cherish the memories is a skill to aquire.

Live for today, Class of 09 because we'll never get tonight back. Say what you need to say to your friends because after you walk out the doors these relationships won't be the same.
That can be a very cool thing but it can also be sad..

So cry when you need to, laugh every moment, love at all times and remember to smile :)

I've learned so far that
Life only gets better!!
God only gets better!!
Joy keeps growing,
and love keeps you going..!

Good luck and be blessed- all of you.

Love,
Kylie

a postsecret i wouldnt mind mentioning

2009-06-02T10:58:00.001-07:00

Sometimes I wonder if Australia is far enough to get away from Pittsburgh...

LOVE

2009-05-31T20:13:00.001-07:00

1st, 2nd and 3rd John... read them.

It's all about love. Everything comes back to love.

It's a blessing that my car stereo went out because God knew I wouldn't just give up listening to music. I've been using the quiet time to sing a new song and pray to Him. He knew.. and I knew.. that I needed to give that up for a while- but not till now did I actually do it.. but it's cause He kinda let the fuse blow at this exact, right moment. haha He's a funny guy.. :-P

and a great Father.

Love you all and hope you read those short books- they'll change your life if you let them and use them.

Apex: after

2009-05-25T12:26:00.000-07:00

This past weekend was amazing (just like I knew it would be..)

I grew closer with my youth group and as a whole I think we're more open as a group and we're getting to know each other better as friends. I was also able to connect with other people from different backgrounds and cultures which was incredible. I totally live in a Pennsylvania bubble.

I think we all (our youth group as a whole) entered into worship with a new sense of hunger and longing for the things of Jesus Christ and the passion that drove Jesus to the cross became the passion that was compelling our youth group to go farther in their worship.

The messages were straight forward and to the point but made me think about a lot. It helped re-evaluate my life on its path right now and opened my eyes to new things and helped me regain clarity.

The word LOVE has come up in my life a ton lately. (God always uses a word in repetition to speak to me and make His point..) So this weekend I was convicted about love and all the different things that go along with loving one another, loving when people don't deserve it, loving yourself, too. It also delt with a broken heart and how LOVE (GOD) can heal it.

No matter who or what hurts or scars your heart, you can't let it cause you to fall. Giving the devil a foothold because of something someone else has done to you or a mistake you have made isn't the right way to handle the hurt. Understanding that you can't blame someone else for the state of your own heart is something we all need to learn because it's such a valuable lesson. Once we get past that lesson, we're able to be on such a higher level than we were before. It opens up another step to the relationship God desires with us.

God healed a lot of wounds that I'd been harboring in my heart. Bitterness and unforgiveness, pain and a broken heart..

But there's also the side where WE come in.. another thing that totally clicked with me this weekend was that there are two things that happen when we are expecting or asking God to do something.
1. You're gonna ask and God will always listen.
2. You TAKE ACTION FIRST THEN GOD WILL WORK

Being faithful to God goes hand in hand with Him being faithful to us.
I know I've said this before but it's so true: If God calls us His friend, shouldn't we try our best to be a good friend to HIM?

Why are we loyal to our friends, make plans to be with our friends, think about our friends, do things for our friends, call and talk to our friends... but we can't make the time to spend with our Creator?

By the way, here's the story about "Battle of the Bands"
I wasn't even going to bring my drum to Apex and I honestly don't know (well I didn't know at the time) why I was even putting my drum in my car on Friday. My heart needed healed and I just didn't wanna take the time to pour into other people. I was mad at everyone and everything on the inside and coming to Apex I didn't even want to change my attitude.
Friday night and Saturday afternoon a few people asked me about playing for the competition but I quickly dismissed it and told everyone no. Absolutely not.
Friday night God began to work and soften my heart for the rest of the weekend. The message was about the Voice of Truth and how we should be like David. Facing giants in our lives can be tough but we need to listen to the right voices.
Saturday I was still in a bad attitude and just wanted to have fun. I was enjoying the workshops and the company of friends. Apex was great!
Saturday night God came and opened my H-E-A-R-T. With each letter and each word that it stood for, my heart was healing. I realized after that message that it wasn't anyone's fault but my own.
What stood out plainly was the fact that we need to follow God's heart beat. When Pastor Randy said that, my heart dropped into my shoes and my throat felt all funny. A few years ago it was prophicied over me that I play God's heart beat... I immediately repented because I knew that my hands were not worthy of anything God was doing through me... I knew I needed that heartbeat back into my heart and back into my hands.
Sunday after the morning service, Manny, who I haven't played music with since September asked if I wanted to do "Battle of the Bands". We would play the song we wrote right after church camp last year: In Spirit and In Truth.
I knew I had to do it. It wasn't for the competition for me. My heart was finally right with God and all I wanted to do was play my drum for Him as an offering.
Winning the competition wasn't as great of an accomplishment as the product of WHY I was playing my drum. All I cared about was that when we won, over 700 people would be able to use that song to enter into the presence of God, just like I do.
And go figure, the continuous message of the night after we opened the service was about worshiping in spirit and in truth.

God is so good!

If you're looking for answers and you're not getting one, check your heart. It may be that you need to take action so that God can do His part.
God just wants us to obey Him.

When I surrender, He smiles. When He smiles, my heart is glad.

My prayer for all of you who went to Apex is this:
Do not fall two weeks later, two months later, two years later.. keep on keeping on.. God has called you, and this past weekend was real. It touched you, it changed you, it refreshed you, it reminded you that you're valuable, it reminded you that you're a child of God, it showed you that you're loved beyond measure and it showed you that the presence of God is irreplaceable. Don't forget what He did for you. He doesn't ever forget you. So be the salt and light of the world and take action when it comes to sharing the Gospel. Take action when it comes to walking straight and narrow path. Take action when your friends are telling those jokes. Be the one to take a stand.. because when Jesus took up the cross He was thinking of YOU. I pray you all do something amazing with joy God has given you this weekend and that it carries out forever and you're never lacking. I also pray that through everything, you'll remember that you're more than a conquorer through our Lord Jesus Christ. Be a worshiper and remember that it's a lifestyle.. not just a part of the Sunday agenda. Ignite your faith.

Love, Kylie

APEX: before

2009-05-21T15:28:00.000-07:00

I always like to write down what I'm expecting from God for a retreat because when I come back I love seeing how he exceeds my expectations.

In a natural sense, I'd really love to connect more with my own ministry and some of the younger girls in it so I can be a closer mentor to them. I want my youth group to become better friends so that we can be an example to the believers in speech, life, love, faith and purity together when they see us interact at church.

I pray that our youth become on fire because sometimes I just think something is lacking, and that's the fire. I'm believing that it's gonna happen this weekend and I'm so excited to be a part of it. I want the youth to bring it back with them.
Our youth group isn't going to grow in number if the numbers we already have aren't growing spiritually.

Personally, I'd like to be refreshed. I've felt like I've lost a bit of a sense of direction. It's a bit forth coming to be out in the open about these personal problems but I believe as the Body of Christ we're to be building up each other and praying for one another.

I've felt like I've been sinking slowly lately. It's partially because it's the end of my senior year, though. I'm able to place some of the blame on that..

A lot of it's on my own shoulders though, and I'm just looking forward to a new experience with my Saviour.

I love being in God's presence... it's familiar, but it's also something new every time. Like your favorite song, you always find something you've never listened to.. a breath you didn't know the vocals took, a chord you never would have thought of, a beat you didn't know existed and you've listened to the same song for years... it's already something you trust, you know, you love.. but it's always new, in a new environment, you're always changing.. but He remains the same- all powerful, all loving, the ever living God.. and He's all ours!

So excited for this weekend- I'll be sure to give you an update on how it goes!!

Private Life vs. Church Family

2009-05-10T14:41:00.000-07:00

First off, Happy Mother's Day.. sorry I don't have anything fancy to say about it- but yeah, I really do appreciate all you mothers- especially my own!!

I wanted to talk about the pastors kid thing for a second.
OK more like a few minutes.

I really don't mind being a PK unless it gets into the whole... the church knows all my business.
its not like we do anything bad.. but I don't really care for someone coming up to me asking me how my day out with my friends was or something when I don't even know the people asking me. They may think that because my dad is their pastor, that they have some connection to me- but thats like.. my private life... It's touchy.

I honestly feel like one of those celebrities who everyone gets in their business and judges them on every single thing they do... like, am I seriously not allowed to see Dane Cook just cause he drops the F bomb? Cause I'm sure if I was just a random person in the church no one would ask me about it.

I guess yes, there is a 'higher standard' placed on me- but really? You're really gonna hold stupid teenager stuff over my head like you're my parents or something? Since when did my business become yours? Since when did my private life become a free for all, for everyone to be a part of? Since when was I unable to pick and chose who I wanted to know things about my life?

People I hardly know come up to me and ask me how my night was with my friends or something, and it creeps me out. I just want my life to be private!

I debating to kick people off my facebook unless you people can give me a strong reason not to. For now, I'm cool with this... but if this gets worse.. I'm gonna start telling these people to get new hobbies other than stalking and judging the pastors children. There's better things to do with your life... I'm not that interesting, people!! Go away!!!!

Maybe you feel the same way..

2009-05-07T10:03:00.000-07:00

I want the Bible to be more important to me than someone else telling me what God has for me.
I want worship to be more important to me than the music.
I want tithes and offerings to be more important to me than a paycheck.
I want lost souls to be more important to me than acceptance from the world.
I want living for God to be more important to me than anything else.

What else is there worth living for?
What else is there worth dying for?

Expectations

2009-04-29T09:45:00.001-07:00

Expectations can be a motivating thing, or it can totally ruin someone.

It's great to set goals and have hopes for someone in your life, but be sure to never set the bar so high that it's impossible to reach it. This happens a lot when you're relying on someone, they don't follow through, and then you're left in disappointment because they've failed in your eyes.
Maybe they've done the best they can do for you. Maybe what you were asking of them was too much to handle. Maybe they didn't know how to react, how to do, what to say, to what you asked of them.You're left feeling like this person didn't care enough, didn't try hard enough.

When expectations are a good thing, you're setting goals for someone to be motivated to reach. They set the person up to succeed. The bar is raised higher than it was before, but still in the area of being capable to reach... then the next objective is set after this one is attained. To whom much is given, much is expected.

Don't set someone you love dearly up for failure. You'll end up hurting both of you.
Instead, be thankful for the things they do for you, and use those as a guide to show you how this person is trying to love you the best that they know how.

Never Give Up!!!

2009-04-26T05:28:00.000-07:00

In church lately, my dad has been talking about how we need to get ready for the harvest. (of people, duh) and it always reminds me of the song "Get Ready for Revival" by Bethany Church (you should look it up.. its pretty fun!)

I am beginning to see this "harvest" in different ways.. there are friends I've been praying for so much and so long that are finally coming to God after years of praying for them, after countless conversations about God... everything.. it's all coming together.

It's amazing to have faith and trust in God.. but there's always that little part of you that wants to SEE God working- well this is Him revealing that little piece of the puzzle for me. It helps me hold on- so look around you.

God's doing something miraculous every day, you just have to look for it.
Jeremiah 29:13

Same Power

2009-04-19T19:39:00.001-07:00

"The same power that conquored the grave lives in me" is a line from a song, but also in the Bible (right about now I'm a little too lazy to look it up. I know it's there, though.)

Thinking about that same thought.. put it into a perspective that you may not think of every day.
Ever been jealous of someone that seemed to "have more of a connection to God" than you? Or how about someone who seemed to have more gifts than you, or in general just a "better Christian" than you?

Well look at it like this, please. We all have different gifts and talents that God placed in each of us for our own purposes.
Plus, you reach different people than others. Only you have the ability to reach certain people!
That's special, and that's yours!

If you're sitting in a pew on a Sunday morning thinking to yourself that you're not as good as the pastor, worship team or a youth leader.. think twice. You've got a lot to offer your church, you just have to find out what exactly your gifts are.. and remember that without you, there is a hole that cannot be replaced.

You are unique and you are needed.

Quote of the Day

2009-04-15T09:22:00.001-07:00

"Never fear tomorrow, God is already there."

In Spirit and Truth

2009-04-12T19:02:00.000-07:00

"Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth."

John 4:23-24

Israel Houghton's "Power of One"

2009-04-05T10:57:00.000-07:00

Israel Houghton has a new album out.. excluding the name "New Breed" but still using them... you can find on his myspace the reason why, but he still uses them in his songs and such. They're not gone.

This CD is amazing and Israel never ceases to floor me. There's a little bit of everything for everyone on this album. It's got every flavor for every style of music.

It's incredible the way these musicians play- their skill level and their creativity is a blessing and Israel's style.. (well, his style that combines just about every style imaginable) is surely something worth listening to.
Just because it's a self titled album doesn't mean it's any different.. if anything, it's better.

I don't the phrase "breath of fresh air" but it's almost the only phrase I can come up with when I think of how refreshing it is to hear some real talent, real music, those melodies and harmonies and the incredible ways those musicians come up with the craziest fills and licks and such.. it's the coolest gift from God ever, being able to play like that.
It's muuuusssiiiccc to my ears!!!!

Israel's new CD, like all of his others- is still original, but definitely distinctively his own.

"What if it all depended on me. To change the world. To change the world? What if my only responsibility was to change the world. To change the world? Let me be the ONE. To start a revolution. Let me sing my song to the people of the world. It all begins with.ONE THE POWER OF ONE. JOINING THE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF PEOPLE BELIEVING IN ONE. THE POWER OF ONE. DON'T HANG AROUND. STAND UP OR SIT DOWN. IT ALL BEGINS WITH ONE.What kind of love can conquer disease. And change the world. And change the world? What can I do to make poverty history. And change the world. And change the world? Let me be the ONE. To start a revolution. Let me sing my song to the people of the world. To the children of the world. It all begins with...Please don't turn away. Let your voices rise. Put love on display. And make a difference now. I believe you and me. Can make a difference now. Oh oh oh. It all begins with ONE. " -Israel Houghton (The Power of One)

Untitled Song Lyrics.. how about you all vote on a title or something...

2009-03-31T10:17:00.001-07:00

You said you would call
You said you would write
But didn’t I tell you
And yes I was right
Once someone leaves
It’s never the same
And promises made
Are now to blame

Don’t tell me that you still want to be friends
Don’t tell me this isn’t the end
Don’t tell me that I’m there inside your heart
When you know, that when I go, we’ll fall apart

Empty words and promises you broke
Don’t wish for things that later you will choke
I knew from how you said it that you lied
And that’s when a piece of me died

I finally wrote the music to those lyrics that I wrote a while back and it sounds pretty good but when I recorded it on my computer it sounded pretty fuzzy and stuff.. so I'm not posting it. Sorry you're all totally missing out haha just kidding. You can read the lyrics though cause I'm sick of storing up all these songs without music and never sharing them.
Anyone wanna write my music? Be my guest. I need a new composer, anyway... mine kinda.. well let's not go there!

Love you all. Peace out.

Past Blogs on MySpace...

2009-03-30T18:54:00.000-07:00

I'm finally turning it all over to "Blogger" and I'm gonna stop writing blogs on my MySpace.

I'll be using this blog, but I didn't have the patience to copy/paste three years worth of blogs into this because the HTML and MySpace stuff wouldn't let me use codes and such.

If you'd like to read previous blogs from basically 2005-2008 you'll have to go to www.myspace.com/giveme_nova_caine

It's the only reason I'm keeping my MySpace. I have a lot of memories on those blogs! I've decided to post some of my more recent ones on this blog.. I did copy/paste some of them on here so you can check them out.

A lot of the good ones are still on MySpace, though.

Thanks for tuning in and checking out my new page!

Multi-Tasking

2009-03-27T14:17:00.000-07:00

I have honestly not been able to stop thinking about how drumming and singing are my calling- but then I kept doubting myself.. and God.. when it came to "well how can I do both?"

God blew my mind today as I came across these videos:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjBw1OwljGA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64RYmaq9lJM

(you can look up more on your own..)

turns out I can totally play all my percussion and drums and sing to the Lord at the same time.. how amazing are those videos!?!

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD... even when you think it is. He'll prove you wrong- but in your favor....that totally just made my day

Praying for You

2009-03-26T11:37:00.000-07:00

I've decided in recent weeks that it's more important for me to pray for others than to pray for my self. Sometimes all we ever think about is our selfish desires- me, me, me.
It's all the world illustrates to us, today. If we don't get our way, we fight until we do.. no matter who or what we step on or stab in the back to get there.

My big sister told me something that I'll always remember.. not just because she said "always remember that" haha.. She said: "Be friends with people who celebrate you, not tolerate you."

This brings me to my first point- how many friends do you have that don't pray for you, they push you down into the dirt so that they can use you to get to where they're going? Or maybe you're the friend doing all that pushing around? Are you using your friends? Are they using you? Better yet- do you have friends that celebrate you? When I say CELEBRATE, I'm talking about encouraging relationships that build you up every day in your walk with God and in life. Are your friends dragging your down or are they helping you be the best you can be and they're happy to be your friend!?

When you have that, it's a lot easier to pray for others than yourself. Though, it's necessary to pray for your enemies and those who persecute you, by nature it's easier to love people who love you back.

My next point is this.. I've come to the conclusion that praying for my dearest friends, my acquaintances, my loved ones.. and my enemies, friends who have hurt me, used me or left me in the dirt to clean up their messes... is entirely too important to give up. Don't ever stop praying for others, no matter what.

Prayer is a vital communication between you and your Maker. It's a huge faith builder, too. Don't you feel closer to God when you're praying?
Plus, what's a pretty tangible way of reaching out to others without trying to bring personal gratification to yourself... pray for them. No one has to know you're doing it, no one needs to. It's simply your way of thanking God for placing people in your life that you can be a blessing to and show God's love to.

Philippians chapter 1 is my favorite when it comes to praying for others. Check it out.. this is my prayer for you today and always:

Philippians 1:3-11

3I thank my God every time I remember you. 4In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
7It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart; for whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God's grace with me. 8God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus.
9And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, 11filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.

1 John 3:18

2009-03-20T18:07:00.000-07:00

"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." -1 John3:18

Goes right along with what's been on my heart lately- faith without deeds is dead.My welcome packet came in the mail today for my sponsor child. It came with an amazing DVD that I just got done watching.

I was amazed and inspired by these people and the way they work so hard to provide for their families and how much World Vision does to really live out their faith and show people the unconditional love of God.
When I saw 1 John 3:18 on the end of the last video I watched, and the last quote that said "You have one life.." and something about "what will you do with it?"
They had so many discusting stats about how much money Americans spend on a daily basis and such...

one that stuck out to me was that the average African woman walks 6 miles to get water every day, and the average American walks 6 miles in one month.

I thought about people who say they want to change the world. Do you really want to change the world? What are you doing to make that happen? Are you sitting around "waiting for the right time?" Because really.. there is no time to wait.
No one is forcing you to your chair telling you that you can't change the world.
I'm so inspired by these children to work hard and live my life to the fullest.
I know that my sponsor child appreciates the love of God that he is receiving and I'm so thankful to have him in my life.. I can't stop thinking about him.

Go change a life today. You'll be soooo glad that you did.

"Their Hearts Are Far From Me"

2009-03-17T09:44:00.000-07:00

Matthew 15:8 says "They honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me."

Isaiah 29:13 says "The Lord says: "These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men."

James 2:26 says "...Faith without deeds is dead."

We often refer to 1 Corinthians as the definition of love, but we skip over the first few verses when it says that you could have anything in the world but if you don't have love, you are nothing.. we are nothing.

So I hope I knocked you all off your high horses back to earth for the rest of my blog. Just wanted to put everyone in their place so you can really hear what I have to say with an open heart and mind.

How many times do we make this whole "Christianity" thing lip service? Practice what you preach, please. I can't stress how much I've seen this in my school lately. I am not pointing fingers at any of you because I know I'm guilty of the same things.
Honestly, I didn't even know that the church down the road from mine even had a large youth group. Is that sad or what? Appearently, a ton of kids attend it and claim to be Christains who love God, but probably only a couple of them I've ever even heard the name Jesus from their lips. Honestly, I'm sure a few times I've heard some of them utter "Jesus Christ" in a bad way...

I know I'm sounding extremely harsh right now, but sometimes we need Godly correction from others in the faith to help us get back on track. I know from experience that when you call yourself a Christain you're set at a higher standard than most people, even if it's not fair. That's just how it goes.

It gets discouraging when I see people's myspaces or facebooks from my school and they say they love God or love being at church... when if I never read that I would have never known.

That same church I was talking about just got back from a retreat of some sort and most are wearing a necklace of a cross with Jesus' name on it.
A few days ago I saw a girl cuss out her 'friend' in the hallway and storm away.. but that was after I saw that she had that necklace on.

Gaurd your witness, guys. People are watching and people are expecting you to hold yourself at a higher standard and set examples.

I'm sure some of you are doing that. I understand that we all slip up- but I'm talking to all of you hypocrites right now. (THIS ISNT DIRECTED TO ANYONE I KNOW, JUST THE BODY OF CHRIST IN GENERAL!)

It's time that the Christians step out of their safe little bubbles and start living radical lives for Jesus, no matter what the cost- I'm not sure what you're afraid of, because popularity and acceptance isn't important in high school. If anything, people will notice that you're confident in who you are, and you'll have REAL friends- when you chose to forget about trying to be the coolest one, the one with all the friends, or anything like that.

Guys, it's cool to love Jesus and show it. Cause the last time I checked, He's the only friend that has ever stayed there for me, and the only friend that will ever really last forever.

I know this blog was kinda harsh today but sometimes we all need a little correction, you know?
Hope you all took that in love and you're not offended... but sometimes its ok to be offended, because it gets you thinking- I don't remember that quote exactly but I do know that when something challenges you like this, it's a GOOD thing.

Love you all very much.. not that anyone even reads this blog haha.. I'll just post it on myspace.

Running Requires Water

2009-02-24T18:10:00.000-08:00

I'm writing today with a sore heart.
I normally don't write publically about things like this but I'm thinking this could apply to many people so I'm sharing.
When I'm really upset about something, I blow off steam by running around my neighborhood.. deep breaths, getting winded, legs and chest pounding- the whole 9 yards for a lazy overweight like me. But it's just what I do.. I hate running, unless I'm doing it to methophorically run from my problems.So, as I'm running, I'm spilling out my heart to God.

It almost reminds me of a Psalm- David starts most of them by asking "why me? why now? oh the suffering I'm going through..." but by the end, he's rejoicing and praising God for what God is doing in his life and thanking Him.
That's kinda what I did. I started to run and every burden I was carrying felt so heavy and I just kept asking God "why me... why now..." and this is what He told me..

This whole running thing symbolizes my life. I'm always running the race. Sometimes the road is level, I'm easy breathing and things are great.. Sometimes its an up hill battle for what seems like forever and sometimes I'm just coasting downhill without a care in the world. In any scenerio, I have to stay running. Life doesn't stop for anyone or anything. We have to appreciate the time we have on the level ground to catch our breath and get ready for the next hill.

Too many times, we go out running the race without our water, though.

We wonder why our hearts hurt so bad and why we're so burned out. We ask questions that didn't ever need to be asked and we blame others and God for things we've done.

All we really desire is water to help us get back on track and take away that thirst to help us push through the rest of the race. (To all of you who are not getting my analogy- I'm talking about the Word of God- our Living Water..)

I guess to wrap this all up into a summary, I'd have to just tell you flat out that when you've got a broken heart that needs healing, you can't run away from the race that you're in cause God pretty much needs you right where you're at.
You may not see the finish line, but at least God is with you the entire time holding that cup of cold water. You just have to take it.

One of my best friends gave me Psalm 147:3. "He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds."
Psalm 34:17-19 also says "The righteous cry out and the Lord hears them. He delivers them from all their troubles. The lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles but the Lord delivers him from them all."

All you have left to do is cry out to Jesus.
(now go check out that song... "Cry Out to Jesus" by Third Day)

For I Know the Plans I Have for You

2009-02-06T13:22:00.001-08:00

Looking back on even this past fall, and before that, I see how fast God is moving in my life. He's putting together pieces I never thought possible and He's making a way for me.
This past summer, I helped with NBCA's Summer Arts Camp and taught the students a song thats main message was Jeremiah 29:11.
The music director said "Kylie, when I heard this the first time, it made me think of you." So I carefully took note of the lyrics, and tried not to shed a tear in front of the children while we were practicing. (The little girl singing it on the cd makes it even harder not to cry because listening to a little girl sing these lyrics made me think of how small I was when I wanted the dream that I still want.. and losing sight of it, falling away, going back to it.. etc..)

The lyrics are as follows:

Sometimes I feel so small
I wonder what God wants for me
What will I be?

(I dont remember the rest of the verse or if there is a second verse.. and I can't find a recording!)
:(

When I cannot find my way
I just remember the promise He made

"I know the plans I have for you
I know exactly what to do
I will work a wonder for your good
I will listen when you pray
give you peace for each new day
trust in Me your whole life through
I know the plans I have for you"

Trust me with all your heart
Seek me and you will find
a bright future filled with hope
and purpose for your life

Listening to little kids sing this song put it into perspective for me. It was so moving.. and to find myself in this situation right now where I really have to follow Jeremiah 29:11... it's humbling and it's amazing to know that He has my best interest and He knows exactly what I'm going to do for the rest of my life... and he knows every desire of my heart.

So, God, thank you.. for understanding that sometimes I say I want things, get mad when I don't get them, but You see the bigger picture and give me the things that my heart really desires- in Your own time- in the right time.

Attacking the Worship Team

2009-02-03T18:21:00.000-08:00

I'm hoping the title of this blog catches your attention...
I've just been really heartbroken over a few things lately. I just hope you all know that if you really want God to break your heart for the things that break His, be ready to feel that hurt and pain when it comes.
Watching friends, watching fellow worship team members, watching anyone.. go through the devil's schemes and slowly fading from the faith is.. horrible.
All we can do is pray, because it's all in God's hands- but it's so hard to not do anything about it. You don't want to judge them or push them away farther, but you also have to lovingly correct their ways, you understand?
Sometimes it's so hard to remember that there is only so much you can do for friends who are backslidden.
All I can do is love them, just like Jesus. That's the best I know how to do. Pray for them and love them- but still stand my ground with my beliefs.

Personally, I know from experience that satan loves to attack the worship teams in churches. If you think about it, all through the Bible, in any battle, in any occasion, the music went first before everything. Even today worship comes before the message, etc. This is because it welcomed God into that place.. the singers and musicians were the 'front line'.
"With great power comes great responsibility".... and with that responsibility, there are greater consequences.. and bigger targets on our backs.
So I see that the devil is really trying to take hold of people involved in worship, because of their huge part in leading others into the presence of God.. and welcoming Him into that place.
But I am also encouraged and strengthened by the fact that the power of God through our worship can heal, help and mend broken hearts, broken lives and broken families. Nothing is impossible for God.
When I get discouraged about my fellow worshippers, I remind myself that God knows what is going on, and He knows the plans and purposes for my friends lives. I may not be able to do anything in my own power to help my friends, but when I pray and I believe.. I know God can do anything. I know He will.

For any of you in the same position.. just don't give up on those people you've been praying for. God is using you in their lives in this season for a special purpose, even if you don't see any progress. God is always working. God is always moving.

Update on My Life!!

2009-01-31T18:19:00.000-08:00

I haven't given you all an update on my life recently, so I'd like to inform you all if you're interested in reading on.
I've noticed a lot about myself lately. I'm pretty sure it was today that I realized that I go through seasons with my music.There's always a season where I'm learning and growing and constantly getting filled by the Word. Then after that season, I tend to write A LOT. It's really cool to see that cycle in my life. An area I'd like to improve in with that, is that I don't really keep filling myself once the season of all that writing starts. I need to continue filling myself while I'm writing. Yes, I'll read my Bible but I don't really get into it like I normally would because I focus so much on the writing that God gives me.
So that's music.. I'm entering a "sewing" season right now. I'm not sewing, God is.. into my life. I'm learning that the up's and down's of life are essential and I'm actually looking forward to right now. My here and now, instead of trying to walk into the future.The reaping season would be that writing season.. God fills me up and then just lets me go with everything I've learned to write it all down and get it all out for other people to listen and read for themselves.
So, other aspects of my life have been changing also. I've been more heavily involved with singing this year. A lot in ministry since this summer too. I'm learning that when you give your life to God, truly and completely- He'll use you in every way.
Friendships, relationships.. all of those change without question. That's just me, I guess. I'll find people to stick with me but those will come in God's time. The true desire of my heart is to find those few true friends and I really believe that college will open some of the doors I've been praying for.
I've been trying to work on bearing good fruit from a good tree lately. I've been really convicted about living out what I preach. When I think about how people have hurt me and become bitter over it when I know I shouldn't, I always try to remember and put into perspective that everyone has areas in their lives that they don't succeed. There is always going to be sin and people are always going to let you down. No matter who they are, how good of a christian they are and no matter how good of a friend you believe them to be. The difference is your own reaction to those problems that you face with other people.
So, with that, and learning from others mistakes, and my own, I want to be a good tree... bearing good fruit. (my status today on facebook: Luke 6:43-44)
Moving on and letting go is totally different than giving up. That's a huge thing I've been learning lately, too. Moving on and letting go is what you do when you've done everything in your power to make things right. Giving up is doing nothing. Quitting.
Another thing going on right now is the arrival of the best little men in my life. I don't see Andrew as much as I'll see Elijah, so right now I'd just like to talk about Elijah (no affence, my little cutie pie!!) I'm not going into detail of how I know them.. just know that these little guys are my nephews.
I'm so happy to be having Elijah in my life. He makes me want to be someone's hero, do good things, be a good person... I can't explain it. Those little fingers grabbing mine so tightly felt to me like I could conquor the world, just because he relies on me.I'm getting ahead of myself.Oh, and another update would be that I got a job.. finally.. more to come on that at some point I'm sure.
But at testament to the joy that God placed in my life: a girl who works there, and goes to school with me said that the next time she went into work, the manager who hired me kept thanking her for bringing me there and telling her how nice I was and stuff... it made me feel so good.
I'm glad God gave me the oppritunity to show Himself to this whole new group of people.
God has also restored some relationships in my life. Not to perfection, but just to open up better connections and communication between my family and me. We've always been close, but we're a lot closer than we have been, so it's really nice to have again.
I didn't update you on EVERYTHING.. but that was an overview, alright? haha
God surprises me all the time. People surprise me all the time. The only surprises I know won't hurt me are God's, so needless to say, I've been trusting in God through everything and I'm excited for what I'm doing for Him.There are so many scriptures that I've related to in the past few weeks, months... but I picked one that related to right now, and one that I'm sure we could all use.I love you all, praying for you, and let me know how you're all doing, too.

Love, Kylie

1Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

Romans 5:1-5

Jesus Sets Examples of Rest

2009-01-31T18:15:00.000-08:00

God rested on the 7th day, I believe, to set the example that we will always need to rest... to set aside a specific time to put away all distractions so that we can have alone time with God.

Jesus also set good examples of resting with God, rather than continuing with the busyness of life. (Matthew 14:22-24; Mark 1:35)
Matthew 11:28 also says that when you're burdened and weary, you can go to Him for rest.
After resting, it's so much easier to exit that secret place, go back into the world, and feel re-energized, focused, encouraged and strengthened to continue doing what we're called to do.

scripture references: Matthew 14:22-24

22Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. 23After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, 24but the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it. Mark 1:3535Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.

Have you been setting aside a special time to hear from God on your own? Where you can regain the strength that you need to keep going?

Ecouragement

2009-01-31T12:16:00.001-08:00

I was watching a "vodcast" (wow.. how technically advanced is that! haha) and it was talking about the 7 pillars of wisdom, and how encouragement was wisdom. The 7 things were "encouragement 1. listens, 2. inspires, 3. gathers, 4. gives, 5. strengthens, 6. bounces, 7. is active"

Without getting into a lot of detail of the message.. I got a lot out of the fact that we shouldn't just encourage people when we believe they need it or deserve it. We should be doing it daily! (Hebrews 3:13)

http://www2.hillsong.com/tv/default.asp?pid=2153

You can watch episodes there- but then there was also something else that spoke to me.

In Jeremiah 29, we all know verse 11.. being used often. Verses 4-7 talk about God encouraging the people to build and settle down, make a living and increase, don't decrease.

Don't let your here and now be when you're waiting for better days.. waiting for tomorrow because you know something better will come.. What are you supposed to be doing TODAY?

The 4th thing that really stood out to me:

Stay committed to the prosperity of the place where you find yourself.

Bringing this all full circle- "This is what encouragement does. It doesn't unsettle people. It doesn't destabilize them. It doesn't weaken their position. In fact, it does the opposite. It actually encourages them to actually build, increase, prosper... and the way to get the best out of any season in your life is being committed to the prosperity of the place where you find yourself. Because prosperity has a way of rubbing off on others..... that's contagious. It rubs off on people." -Brian Houston

Grains of Sand

2009-01-27T18:25:00.000-08:00

Psalm 139:17 - 18

"How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them,

they would outnumber the grains of sand.

When I awake,

I am still with you.

I read in one of Bobbie Houston's blogs that she was reflecting on this scripture and when I read it, this scripture was renewed in me.I know that many of you know that God's thoughts for us outnumber the grains of sand.. but did you ever stop to think about how extreme that thought really is?Bobbie was in a hotel room, looking down from her balcony, when she saw the sand on the beach. She pointed out that you couldn't even see one tiny grain- now multiply that one tiny grain to how many are on that beach...Now on top of that- think of how much sand is on this earth!So every single grain of sand.. no matter how small, no matter how many- God's thoughts for you personally outnumber every single one of them.Next time you think you don't matter, think you're worthless, think you don't have purpose, think someone doesn't love you or think that no one is thinking about you... remember that scripture.

God is always thinking of you.

Wishes and Dreams

2009-01-27T15:29:00.000-08:00

Lately, I've been learning to put all my trust in the Lord. We're constantly being told to trust Him and His ways, but we seldom chose to make that a daily habit. Not until recently have I begun to take it seriously.

My walk with God has increased a lot over the past year. I've matured a lot by leaning on God instead of friends, embracing my calling and making it a priority to read my Bible.
Growing up in church, I've always felt the need to do all of these things but I don't think it was ever very personal. It was more of a religious thing than a relationship thing.
More people than I'd like to admit have seen my at my worst, and sad to say, a lot of these people still view me as that person I once was. Hence, God brings people in your life for seasons. I've grown to realize this reality far too much and too often.

This brings me all to my point.
The picture I've posted of hands holding those glittery stars symbolize what a dear mentor of mine showed me last year. I was in a rut, trying to figure out what God wanted me to do with my life and which direction to chose. But, when he told me "Kylie, you're a musician waiting to go-" (Then he simply blew into his hands and had me imagine all of that glitter flying out from his hands.) You can imagine the sight, right? What a powerful demonstration that was to me. Plus, it was very encouraging.

God has His hands on me and is molding me to become the musician He wants me to be. So, as I wait to go from the palm of my own hand, to be blown throughout the world, I sit and repeat Stellar Kart song lyrics:

"I'll be the one who makes you laugh
Make up for the memories that made you sad
Me and you together, forever we could be
Someday you will find me in all your wishes and dreams."

I see God all over my wishes and dreams now.. all I want is His perfect will. Whatever that is, I know I'm ready for it, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get there. To do that, I must trust Him.
With Him I can do anything and without Him I can't do anything.

"Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all of your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths strait." Proverbs 3:5-6

After you have done everything, to stand.

2009-01-21T18:26:00.000-08:00

Ephesians 6:10-18

10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

---You don't have to fight these battles in your mind, body and spirit alone. The battle belongs to the Lord. When you've done everything you can, there is only one thing left for you to do. Too many times we think God is done with us or forgot about our situation even though we had been praying so much and so often. But even when He is testing our faithfulness, we need to take advantage of our situations and believe that God ISN'T letting go.
He is a faithful God- one of mercy, compassion and grace. He tells us to "stand" because standing your ground is such a testimony to your faith in Him. When there's nothing to do but give up, don't give up.

God isn't finished with you or your miracle.

Standing is your expression of integrity, character, trust, hope, faith, courage and relationship with God.When you stand, you encourage others to do the same.You wanna make a difference in the world? Stand your ground. After you have done everything, to stand.

Don't Be Dead Roses

2009-01-05T18:30:00.000-08:00

I was cleaning my room today (pause for a moment of silence.. yes, I did clean my room)

AS I WAS CLEANINGGGG.... I came across these pink roses that my family got for me when I had my gallbladder taken out... in what, like September or something? Well they were still in the vase and everything.. and there was like a drop of water in the bottom but it looked like the nasty rot and crap was just taking over them. They looked discusting and I wanted to throw them away. It kinda sucked cause every time I tried to touch them they'd fall apart. (that's bad- because I was TRYING to clean.. but I was just making a bigger mess!)

The point I'm trying to make is this...
I'm sure they would have lasted longer if I would have taken care of them.. if I would have watered them and kept them in sunlight, instead of neglecting them and leaving them to die, even though I knew what they needed to survive.

Now think about that in your own life- how many times do we know what we should be doing (i.e. praying, reading our Bible, going to church, fellowshipping with believers, using your gifts and talents for God's will and fulfilling your purpose...) but we don't do them?

Metaphorically, using those dead roses- that's what your spirit will look like. Your heart runs dry. It's thirsty and it needs Jesus, yes?

When I tried to cut off a rose from the bunch, it litterally just snapped and all the pedals fell off immediately... all over my carpet....... point being, they were so dry that they fell apart at the slightest movement or waver!

Don't be so dry that you spiritually fall because your foundation is that bad. Keep up the pruning- God's got a lot for your life and it's about time you take it seriously.

I don't know who that's for, but its for someone. Take it and use it.

Love you all, have a great new year, and remember to stay watered with your Word, and stay in the SON.

Rampart

2008-12-28T18:32:00.000-08:00

Psalm 91:4 says "He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart."

When I have ever read that I actually never expanded my vocabulary to the capacity of using the word "rampart." and I usually just skip right over it and I'm like "aw thanks God for being my shield and rampart".. I figured if God was a rampart it must be good, right? haha

In church today I was thinking about it and I really was wishing I had a dictionary with me at the time cause then it was bugging me that I didn't know what "rampart" meant! So I looked it up when I got home.

Rampart is actually an elevated place of refuge or fortification (not to be confused with the word fornification...) that is normally capped by a rock.

How awesome is that? All this time I skim over the word rampart, when I should have looked it up a long time ago.
I'm probably one of the last people on the earth to know what that word means, but I guess if any of you didn't know what it meant I helped you out a bit...

It's really cool to think about the connection witha rampart being capped by a rock- a lot of symbolism... Jesus, being The Rock of Salvation and such, standing on The Rock, building your house on solid ground... all of that.

So maybe I learned something today- and maybe you did too.

Look up the words you don't understand in the bible cause they might just put a whole new spin on the scripture that you tend to skip over and don't understand.

Famous Little Fish

2008-11-25T18:34:00.000-08:00

Look at the poor goldfish in that tank
tired of predictability, his flake dinner already sank
he'll end up in oceans, maybe when he's gone
but for the life he's been living, what has he done

I wonder if he knows he'll never amount to much?
Does he not long for something bigger?

I don't wanna end up like a goldfish
complacent and replaceable
I'd like to be a little fish with wild colors in the sea
and everyone would take pictures of me
I'd be a famous little fish and change the ocean for good
A goldfish wouldn't but a famous one could
I know I could

Goldfish remind me of being lukewarm
a repetitive process of those who are torn
they ride the fence but they're alright with glass bowl
strapped in tap water, instead of swimming in schools

I wonder if they care about amounting to much?
Do these people not long for anything bigger?

Don't let me become a goldfish, God
I've got too much left to do in my life
I've got too many people to reach and too many lives to touch
Don't let me become a goldfish, God
I've got too much left to do in my life
I've got too many people to reach
and too many fishbowls to break

My Plans and His Plan

2008-11-17T18:50:00.000-08:00

Seems that every time I make myself a plan, it fails
Instead of walking in Your destiny, I pick uneven trails

I look left and right, when I should be on the high road
Then I act all surprised when I see the right path overgrown

It may be uncertain but it's always clear
It may not be my own plans, but there's no reason to fear

I may be afraid but I know that You're with me
I may have made my own plans, but You're there correcting

You know the plans You have for me
Plans to give me hope future, destiny

The plans You have prosper and not harm
So really there shouldn't be cause for alarm

You've got me in your arms so tight, don't let go
I know you won't, cause that's the kinda love You show

So God take my plans, cause they fail me every time
I have to trust in You... instead of my meaningless rhymes.

Where You lead, I will follow. I don't have another choice
Now I sing of Your grace. You gave me this voice....